"Unreal Estate" is a SpongeBob SquarePants episode from Season 10. In this episode, SpongeBob fears that he is allergic to his pineapple house, so Squidward offers to help him find a new home and trouble ensues.
- SpongeBob SquarePants
- Squidward Tentacles
- Dream Squidward
- Unnamed barnacle (debut)
- Incidental 69
- Patrick Star
- Gary the Snail
- SpongeBob's house (in flashbacks)
- Burger Beard
- Painted parrot
- Humans in the restaurant
- Bikini Bottomites (in Squidward's daydream)
- Shelley (cameo)
The episode starts with SpongeBob scraping barnacles off his pineapple home. Squidward is painting a picture of him asking standing over SpongeBob and Patrick. He gets distracted by the noise going on outside and goes out to stop it. SpongeBob's hose starts flailing all over the place and fills Squidward up with water. A few kids think he's a sprinkler and come to play in the water. SpongeBob then proceeds to turn the hose water off, much to the kids' dismay. Squidward takes the hose out of his mouth, causing it to sag, then he tells SpongeBob what he was trying to say, but the latter misses the point and turns it back on, then off again.
After being irritated by this occurrence, Squidward tells SpongeBob that everything he does is horrible and that he should move away. This leads SpongeBob to tearing up and reminiscing the memories he and his (supposedly anthropomorphic) house have shared together throughout the years. As a result, he refuses to move away. Desperate for him too, Squidward tries to convince SpongeBob that he is allergic to his own home. Although SpongeBob sneezes a few times, he finds this statement rather silly and goes back inside.
Later that day, Squidward breaks into SpongeBob's house while he's sleeping and fills the hole of his foghorn alarm clock with pepper as a means to get him to develop allergies to his pineapple and thus move away. Although he succeeds, Gary catches Squidward in this act and engages in a brutal fight with him, to which SpongeBob adores and deems "playtime." The following day, SpongeBob wakes up to his alarm clock emitting the aroma of pepper, causing him to sneeze constantly. He then tries to cook eggs for breakfast, also releasing sneezes. The sneezing process continues when he is in the shower and trying to shave, which causes him to remove part of his skin rather than his beard.
After failing to get better, SpongeBob thinks that what Squidward said the other day might have been true and finally agrees to move out and go house hunting with him.
Squidward recommends various homes for him: a banana, a hot pepper, a chicken parmesan hero house, a coffin, a dresser, and a fish tank located in a seafood restaurant; the first three are accompanied by SpongeBob imagining his life in the houses with parodies of the show's theme song playing in each daydream. SpongeBob doesn't find any of these appealing, especially the last of the six, due to being located in a restaurant that serves fish. However, he finally finds one that catches his interest due to its fancy atmosphere. Squidward admires the house too, and as such convinces SpongeBob that the home isn't suitable for him because it's too fancy and will thus force him to struggle through the lifestyle of fame. As a result, Squidward offers him his own house so the former can relax and indulge in the atmosphere without the annoyance of SpongeBob. Unbeknownst to this, SpongeBob thanks Squidward and bids him farewell prior to leaving.
Squidward later feels relieved, finally being able to sleep peacefully without the annoying antics of SpongeBob and Patrick. However, when he wakes up the following day, it is revealed that the "house" is actually a spaceship when Squidward realizes that the "alarm clock" is actually a timer. He is then launched into space, much to his anger, and the landing of the ship only makes matters worse for him.
Squidward lands back on Conch Street, angrily demanding that SpongeBob give him his Easter Island Head house back, which is now painted to resemble SpongeBob's pineapple As The Color Orange. SpongeBob refuses and suggests that he go find somewhere else to reside. Squidward then resorts to living in SpongeBob's own pineapple, but he can't since Patrick now lives there and is munching on a majority of the house, Squidward now realizes that making SpongeBob move out wasn't a good idea. Much to his reluctance, this leaves him no choice but to live under Patrick's rock, which falls down on him and squishes his nose, leading him to let out a pained groan as the episode ends.
- The show's theme song plays at the first three houses Squidward recommends to SpongeBob.
|( ‣ ) Associated production music|
|( • ) Original music|
|( ◦ ) SpongeBob music|
‣ Coffee Bar - Peter Yorke [Title card.]
• Rip Tide - Nicolas Carr, Sage Guyton, Jeremy Wakefield [Opening.]
‣ Orchestral Suite #3 - Gavotte - Fiachra Trench, Johann Bach [Squidward painting.]
‣ Drama Link (D) - Hubert Clifford [Squidward screams.]
• Steel Licks 6 - Jeremy Wakefield [SpongeBob hoses off his house.]
‣ Long Distance Mission [#20] - Phil Green [Water bursts through Squidward's windows.]
• Grass Skirt Chase - Sage Guyton, Jeremy Wakefield [Squidward sprayed with water.]
• Skipping to School - Sage Guyton, Jeremy Wakefield [Squidward pulls the hose out of his mouth.]
• Vibe Q Sting - Nicolas Carr ["Or could you?"]
• Skipping to School - Sage Guyton, Jeremy Wakefield [SpongeBob goes back inside his house.]
• Lap Steel - Nicolas Carr [Squidward gets an idea.]
• Down in Davy Jones' Locker - Nicolas Carr [Squidward sneaks away, laughing.]
• Steel Licks 36 - Jeremy Wakefield [SpongeBob and Gary sleeping.]
‣ Comic Walk - Sidney Torch [Squidward puts pepper into SpongeBob's bedroom.]
‣ Agitation Bridge 5 - Phil Green [Gary wakes up.]
• Steel Licks 9 - Jeremy Wakefield [Gary attacks Squidward.]
• 12th Street Rag 3 with Bass - Nicolas Carr, Sage Guyton, Jeremy Wakefield [SpongeBob wakes up sneezing everywhere the next morning.]
• The Donut Dilemma - Nicolas Carr [Squidward suggests SpongeBob move.]
‣ Happy Boy - Jack Shaindlin [SpongeBob's good times with the pineapple.]
• A Casual Conversation - Nicolas Carr, Barry Anthony [SpongeBob sneezing as Squidward pours pepper on him.]
◦ SpongeBob SquarePants Theme Song - Derek Drymon, Stephen Hillenburg, Mark Harrison, Blaise Smith [Banana house.]
• Nude Sting - Nicolas Carr [SpongeBob slips on a banana peel.]
◦ SpongeBob SquarePants Theme Song - Derek Drymon, Stephen Hillenburg, Mark Harrison, Blaise Smith [Hot pepper house/Chicken parmesan hero house.]
• Lap Steel - Nicolas Carr ["Nope."]
• Unknown Track 65 - [At the coffin.]
• Steel Licks 20 - Jeremy Wakefield [SpongeBob and Squidward leave the coffin.]
• Hello Blues - Sage Guyton, Jeremy Wakefield [SpongeBob hitting Squidward with the drawers.]
‣ Fanfares 18 C Maj - Marcin Pospieszalski [At the castle.]
• Lounging and Fine Dining No Vibes - Nicolas Carr, Barry Anthony [Fish tank in restaurant.]
• Lap Steel - Nicolas Carr [Transition to next scene.]
• Steel Licks 26 - Jeremy Wakefield ["I don't know, it doesn't look like much."]
‣ Cha Cha Nova - Gerhard Narholz [SpongeBob and Squidward go inside the dirty-looking house.]
‣ Elevator Lounge - Billy Lincoln ["And all the fabulous parties you'd host."]
‣ Gracious Mood for Clarinet - Otto Sieben [Squidward playing the clarinet.]
• Hot Steel and Slide Licks 1 - Jeremy Wakefield [SpongeBob at the window.]
‣ Coffee Bar - Peter Yorke [Squidward on a magazine cover.]
‣ On the Beach - Kapono Beamer [Squidward says SpongeBob can live at his old house.]
‣ Esta Noche (b) - Hans Ehrlinger [Squidward goes to the bed.]
• Lap Steel - Nicolas Carr [Squidward sleeping.]
• Short Rising Tension Bits - Nicolas Carr, Sage Guyton, Jeremy Wakefield ["It's not an alarm clock, it's a countdown!"]
‣ Missile Disaster - John Fox [Rocket takes off.]
‣ Blue Danube Waltz - Johann Strauss Sr [Squidward in space.]
• Hot Steel and Slide Licks (j) - Jeremy Wakefield ["Now this really feels like home."]
• You're Nice - Sage Guyton, Jeremy Wakefield [Ending.]
- This episode is available on the SpongeBob SquarePants Vol. 17, Factory Fresh, The Complete Tenth Season, and SpongeBob is a Doctor DVDs.
- This episode was originally titled "House Hunters," but the title was changed most likely to avoid affiliation with the TV show of the same name.
- The title is a pun on "real estate."
- The title card is similar to "Sentimental Sponge." However, this one is pink instead of orange.
- Also, both episodes start with SpongeBob spring cleaning.
- According to an animatic posted by Vincent Waller, one of Squidward's paintings from "Artist Unknown" (Bold and Brash) was originally going to reappear as a decoration in Squidward's house.
- The waiter carrying the fish at the restaurant was played by studio recording engineer Justin Brinsfield.
- This is the first episode to premiere during the Do the New Saturday Mornings event.
- This is Ben Gruber's first episode as a writer.
- This is the second episode to include an alternate version of the theme song. The first is "Truth or Square."
- This is the fourth episode in which SpongeBob is unable to live in his house, after "Home Sweet Pineapple," "Home Sweet Rubble," and "Sold!".
- It is unknown how SpongeBob moved back into his house after the episode ended.
- When an obese SpongeBob emerges from the chicken parmesan hero house, Hans pokes him in the stomach, and he giggles like the Pillsbury Doughboy.
- When Squidward is in the rocket ship flying back to Earth, it is headed towards the Atlantic Ocean. However, it is later seen that the rocket ship has crashed next to Squidward's house, which is located in the Pacific Ocean.