"Squid Defense" is a SpongeBob SquarePants episode from Season 9. In this episode, Squidward wants to learn karate from SpongeBob and Sandy.



Squidward is working at the Krusty Krab, and SpongeBob accidentally karate chops him. Squidward asks what he was doing and SpongeBob tells him that he is planning to do karate with Sandy, which Squidward thinks is stupid. That night, Squidward is grocery shopping and is approached by a large thug (The Creepy Creeper). Squidward assumes he is going to steal his groceries, so he runs to SpongeBob and asks to be taught karate. However, because SpongeBob is not very good at it himself, he is unable to teach Squidward.

Squidward injured

They then go to Sandy for help. First, she makes Squidward promise not to use it for revenge and use it only for protection. Then, she and SpongeBob try to teach him, but can't. When Squidward said that he had vengeance during training, Sandy then decides to quit on him, but Squidward says he'd do anything, so Sandy makes him do all the work around the treedome saying that it will teach him the basic movements. Finally, Squidward decides to quit, however, he accidentally flings acorns at himself that he was able to dodge. He then found out that in doing all the work, he actually did learn karate.

So then, Sandy presents him his belt to show that he knows karate, but Squidward claims that he has "important business" to attend. He then finds the thug and uses karate to beat him up, with a lot of the moves being related to the housework he did around the treedome.

However, it turns out that he never wanted to steal his groceries, he wanted to return them. SpongeBob and Sandy then came giving Squidward his belt only to find out that he used karate for vengeance. Sandy says that Squidward doesn't deserve his belt and SpongeBob scolds Squidward for not taking Sandy's advice. Then they walk away because Squidward dishonored their trust in him. Squidward is then arrested for assaulting the thug.

Running gags

  • SpongeBob getting sliced in half and characters criticizing Squidward's body by saying, "What with the rubbery arms and the doughiness in the middle."
  • SpongeBob saying, "You missed a spot" when Squidward does Sandy's chores.



 ) Associated production music
 ) Original music
 ) SpongeBob music

  Ripped Hide - Nicolas Carr, Sage Guyton, Jeremy Wakefield [title card]

  Hot Steel and Slide Licks (i) - Jeremy Wakefield [Squidward lying on the floor]
  Unknown Track 46 - Nicolas Carr ["I'm just practicing my karate chops."]
  Bubble Poppin' Boys - Nicolas Carr, Barry Anthony ["You never know what kind of creepy creeper could be creeping creepily around any creepy corner."]
  Vibe Q Sting - Nicolas Carr ["Well..."]
  Goofy Conversation - Nicolas Carr, Barry Anthony [Squidward leaves work]
  Disastrous Event 2 [#37] - Harry Lubin ["Hello? Is somebody there?"]
  Charivari Clowns (a) - Daniel Jean Jeannin [SpongeBob and Gary watching TV]
  Scary Search - Harry Lubin ["SpongeBob, open up!"]
  Unknown Track 46 - Nicolas Carr ["Teach me the way of tarake!"]
  Hot Steel and Slide Licks 4 - Jeremy Wakefield [SpongeBob torn in half]
  Koto Gong Transition - Nicolas Carr ["I don't know, SpongeBob."]
  The Fruitcake Vendor - Nicolas Carr, Barry Anthony [Sandy says karate isn't for revenge]
  Unknown Track 46 - Nicolas Carr [Squidward promises to use karate only for protection]
  Retro Cool 03 095 D - Steve Sechi [Squidward's karate training]
  Koto Gong Transition - Nicolas Carr [Transition to next scene.]
  Retro Cool 03 095 D - Steve Sechi [Squidward's karate training continues.]
  Down in Davy Jones' Locker - Nicolas Carr [Squidward describes his attacker]
  Vibe Q Sting - Nicolas Carr ["Hmm..."]
  Retro Cool 34 095 A - Steve Sechi [SpongeBob wearing a mask]
  Hot Steel and Slide Licks (o) - Jeremy Wakefield ["Got you right where I want you!"]
  The Clear Belt - Nicolas Carr ["Vengeance?"]
  Hot Steel and Slide Licks (j) - Jeremy Wakefield ["This is pointless."]
  Unknown Track 46 - Nicolas Carr [Squidward says he'll do anything]
  Koto Gong Transition - Nicolas Carr [Transition to the next scene]
  Retro Cool 03 095 D - Steve Sechi [Squidward mopping.]
  Koto Gong Transition - Nicolas Carr [Transition to next scene.]
  Retro Cool 03 095 D - Steve Sechi [Squidward vacuuming.]
  Koto Gong Transition - Nicolas Carr [Transition to next scene.]
  Humorous Conversation - Nicolas Carr, Barry Anthony [Squidward burying acorns]
  Hot Steel and Slide Licks (e) - Jeremy Wakefield ["That's it! I am outta here!"]
  Retro Cool 03 095 D - Steve Sechi ["Hey, I'm doing it!"]
  Exotic Sting - Nicolas Carr ["Yee-haw!"]
  Unknown Track 46 - Nicolas Carr [Squidward tears the board and SpongeBob in half.]
  Retro Cool 02 115 E - Steve Sechi ["I can protect my groceries now!"]
  The Soft One - Nicolas Carr [belt of basic competence]
  Koto Gong Transition - Nicolas Carr [Transition to the next scene]
  Evil Horror - Harry Lubin [huge guy approaches Squidward]
  Retro Cool 03 095 D - Steve Sechi [Squidward attacks him]
  Hot Steel and Slide Licks (i) - Jeremy Wakefield [huge guy gives Squidward his groceries back]
  Cloak and Dagger [#69] - Phil Green ["This guy's been karated!"]
  Cloak and Dagger [#70] - Phil Green ["For shame, Squidward!"]
  Hot Steel and Slide Licks (h) - Jeremy Wakefield ["Thanks for dishonoring our trust in you."]
  Bikini Bottom Police - Nicolas Carr [ending]




  • This marks the 350th episode segment of the series.
  • The title card for this episode is similar to that of "Karate Star."
    • Coincidentally, both episodes involve a character learning karate.
    • The center of the title card is also nearly the same as the title card for "The Splinter."
  • On Hulu, the SpongeBob promo is the scene from this episode where SpongeBob and Gary are laughing on the couch, except without sound and it is horizontally flipped.
  • This episode uses a karate chop transition rather than the regular bubble transitions.
  • This is the only episode to date to air on New Year's Day.
  • Squidward is the fourth main character to be seen doing karate, after Sandy, SpongeBob, and Patrick.
    • However, he does not wear karate gear when he does karate, unlike the other three.
    • This is the second episode where a character other than SpongeBob or Sandy learns karate, the first being "Karate Star."
  • There is an online game based on this episode called The Kah-Rah-Tay Squid.
  • This was Blake Lemons' first episode as a writer/storyboard director.
  • This is the second episode where SpongeBob's half bodies can talk to each other. The first is "I Had an Accident."
  • This is the third appearance of the Slug Buddy punching bag, the first being "The Great Snail Race" and the second being "The Way of the Sponge."

Cultural references

  • This episode's title is a pun on "self-defense."
  • The way Squidward did the chores is similar to a scene in the 1984 film The Karate Kid, in which Daniel was tricked by Mr. Miyagi into doing chores at his house.


  • The Krusty Krab toilets are in the wrong place, as they appear on the left side of the restroom area instead of the back.

The couch is missing.

  • When Squidward first bangs on SpongeBob's door and the scene changes over to SpongeBob and Gary, they were sitting on the couch. After SpongeBob lets Squidward into his house and was spooked by Gary, the couch was missing and Gary was suddenly on the floor.

Sandy's tanned teeth.

  • Sandy's bright white teeth turn dark white when Squidward says, "Oh...whatever. Hiyah..."

Tailless Sandy

  • When Squidward is watering Sandy's lawn, Sandy is missing her tail while she is holding an umbrella.
  • Squidward seems to have two tentacles when Sandy pokes him in the stomach.
  • It is unclear what the Slug Buddy is filled with, since after its destruction, nothing is visible except its fabric.
  • Before Squidward broke the board, SpongeBob didn't have a helmet, but when Squidward hits him with his tentacles right into the dome, he suddenly has a helmet.
    • Moreover, after being torn apart, only two small pieces of the helmet are visible, not the majority of it.
  • Gale's t-shirt in this episode is dark pink, instead of the usual light pink.


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