This article is a transcript of the SpongeBob SquarePants Social Media short "SpongeBob Checks His Snapper Chat," which aired on June 10, 2016.

  • SpongeBob: [Holds up his Clamphone] Ahh! The wonders of modern-day technology! [Swipes the "slide to unlock," leading to the Clamphone homescreen] What astonishing and distractionable adventures will you lead me on today! Okay SpongeBob, you've got to figure out about the times! You have got to figure out... [Taps on the Snapper Chat app] Snapper Chat!
  • Title card voice: [Title card starts] ♪Snapper Chat! Is the new thing whenever you can see what your friends are up to and you know when you're missing out on all of the fun!♪
  • SpongeBob: Umm... [Attempting to balance the Clamphone] I guess I'll take a picture of this... [Quickly moves to half-assembled Krabby Patty without lettuce]! [takes a photo of the half-assembled Krabby Patty.]
  • [Switches back to the Krusty Kitchen. SpongeBob draws a smiley face on the Krabby Patty]
  • SpongeBob: [Reading out as he types out the message] Feeling shabby? Get a Krabby Patty! [Deletes all of the message] No, too poetic... [Reading out as he types out the message] Order up! [Types up a thumbs up emoji on the Clamphone screen. Sends the image] Perfect! [To the homescreen of Snapper Chat] La, la la la la... Oh! It magically knows all my friends! What's Sandy doing on here?
  • Sandy: [Appearing scary on the Snapper Chat photo. Making noises in the Snapper Chat photo. Also captioned inside the photo is "#Nofilter"] Urrgh! World! Record!
  • SpongeBob: [As he sees Sandy's image. Talks as if he glorifies the image.] Beautiful! [Shows "Sandy Cheeks for President" with Sandy Cheeks' super long buck teeth and a US flag on it, also holding up a peace finger gesture.] You've got my vote! [Shows "2900°" with Sandy breathing out fire. SpongeBob laughs. Then reads out another image, showing "Hibernating! No updates for 28 days..." with a "zzz" emoji around her.] 28 days? [Starts moving the Clamphone screen in and out for a while] No! [Shows a picture of Sandy in a diving suit with a red cowboy hat and a guitar with caption showing "NVMD I'm back!"] "Nuv'mund' I'm back." Phew, that was close!
  • SpongeBob: Hmm... I wonder what Squidward's up to? [Taps on Squidward's icon]
  • Squidward: [In the photo taking toast points from the oven, with caption showing "Mmmmm. Toast Points."]
  • SpongeBob: Mmm... Ahh! [Another image shows Squidward joyfully smelling the toast points. Caption in phone shows "Date night... With myself"] [Shows Squidward surprised but with a closed mouth and open eyes, also showing a speech bubble "!" emoji. Caption in phone shows "Forgot the fancy cheese!"] Whoops! [Squidward in a relaxing waterfall bath. Shows a peace symbol emoji, a peace gesture emoji and a lotus emoji. Caption in Clamphone shows "Peace & Quiet"] [Laughs] [Reads caption "Note to neighbors, pipe down," showing Squidward open the window to show his surprisedly confused face. SpongeBob laughs again. Shows Squidward with in a bunch of different dance poses with dancer emojis on the pictures.] Oh Squidward, ever the artisque.
  • SpongeBob: [Shows notification about Patrick] Ooh! A message from Patrick! [Reads photo captioned "H3y, just hanNGin' out here"] "Hey, just hangin' out here." [sigh] Patrick I don't think you're using the camera correctly. [Snaps a picture of himself] [Reading out as he types out the message] Can't see. Where is here? [Adds a magnifying glass emoji on the Clamphone screen. Sends the image to Patrick. Screen goes to a "Live" menu] Hmm. Hey! These are all my favorite places! How'd they fit them all in here? [SpongeBob taps the screen. Screen goes to a scene from The Slumber Party episode with the words "Live in Bikini Bottom" at the top with a symbol of SpongeBob's house to the left of the words. SpongeBob hums as he taps the screen changing to a scene from Squid Plus One with the caption "LLL: Live Like Larry" at the top. SpongeBob taps the screen again, changing to a scene from Patrick-Man! with the caption "Mondays" at the top. SpongeBob gasps.] Tartar sauce! [SpongeBob starts humming again as he taps a screen, changing to a picture from Plankton's Pet with a filter making it look like a rainbow is coming out of his mouth.] Whoa! [SpongeBob taps the screen, changing to a scene from Gary's New Toy with a lipstick and a butterfly emoji. SpongeBpb gasps.] Gary!? [SpongeBob taps the screen, changing to a scene from Hello Bikini Bottom! with the caption "3 mph" at the top.] People Snapperchat everything! [The screen then shows an ad for The Krusty Krab. showing scenes from various Krusty Krab episodes.] Ooh! a sponsored advertisement! I love sponsored advertisements!
  • Mr. Krabs: [from the phone] Have yourself a Krabby Patty today!
  • SpongeBob: Don't you worry, Mr. Krabs. I've already had seven! [Shows another notification about Patrick] La la la la la la la la la la. [Shows another picture of Patrick's belly with the caption "StiLL rite hEre" with a smiley face emoji] Oh barnacles. [Snaps another picture of himself. Reading as he types.] I still can't see where you are... [Shows another notification about Patrick again. The picture shows Patrick's belly button with eyes on top of it to make it look like a smiley face with the caption "Hehereher".] Huh? Her her her her her... Oh Patrick, now I'll never know where you are! [Snaps another picture of himself again. Typing the word "Where?"]
  • Patrick: Right here, buddy!
  • SpongeBob: Oh!
  • Patrick: Oh, let's go jellyfishing!
  • SpongeBob: Absolutely! That'll look amazing on my Snapperchat!
  • [As the screen shows a picture of SpongeBob and Patrick jellyfishing with the words "Best Day Ever!" written on it with the word "Day" with a line through it and the word "Friend" above it making it say "Best Friend Ever!"]
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