Encyclopedia SpongeBobia


Encyclopedia SpongeBobia
Encyclopedia SpongeBobia

"Professor Squidward" is a SpongeBob SquarePants episode from season 6. In this episode, Squidward poses as Squilliam to teach a music class.



In the beginning of the episode, Squidward is disdainfully watching Squilliam play his clarinet at a concert. When Squilliam finishes, Squidward angrily leaves. As Squidward walks out of the recital hall, a music school headmistress mistakes him for Squilliam. Although Squidward tells her he is not Squilliam, she informs him that had he was Squilliam, she would've offered him a job to teach a college music class. Too tempted by the offer, Squidward accepts the job posing as Squilliam.

Professor Squidward 030

The music college.

The next day, he comes to the music class wearing a wig. As he is about to instruct the class, a kid asks him if he is going to write his name on the board "like most professors do." Annoyed, Squidward tells the kid to write his name on the board. Shortly after that, SpongeBob and Patrick enter the class and the former nearly blows Squidward's cover, before he tells the two that they are to refer to "[him] only as Professor Squilliam from now until the end of time." When asked why they were at the music class, SpongeBob reveals that he traded his New Year's resolution with Patrick's, which was to play a musical instrument. Later, Squidward starts teaching, but is interrupted by SpongeBob's laughter thrice. When asked about it, SpongeBob claims that Patrick was tickling his foot, but the latter debunks the claim by saying he was tickling his own foot. In order to avoid any more distractions, Squidward moves the seats into a row - with SpongeBob sitting on the left and Patrick sitting on the far right - but SpongeBob keeps on laughing anyway. When SpongeBob is told to stop tickling his foot, Patrick claims that it really was him that time, much to Squidward's surprise.

Professor Squidward 124

Patrick riding a steam train.

Squidward starts teaching about musical scales by drawing lines on the chalkboard. Patrick whispers to SpongeBob - then to Squidward since he already disrupted the class - that they remind him of a railroad track he saw at a railroad track. Patrick also brings up how there was a railroad convention the week prior, where he bought himself a conductor's hat, and brings out a mini locomotive. Patrick somehow turns tiny and starts riding the mini train, only to get trapped in the trash can, although he appears back in his seat briefly after (in his normal size).

Then, Squidward starts teaching the class about metronomes, much to the interest of SpongeBob and Patrick. They fall into a trance making a ticking noise and a news reporter suddenly comes in, wanting to do an interview with "Squilliam Fancyson," although he is soon more interested in SpongeBob and Patrick's trance. Squidward then angrily kicks him out after the news reporter talking about how the trance makes for a better story. SpongeBob and Patrick exit their trance when the bell rings. They forget where they are, resulting in them forgetting Squidward request for them to call him Squilliam, which upsets the rest of the class, causing them to storm off. Squidward desperately blocks the door with his body to no avail, as the police come in along with the music headmistress and the real Squilliam Fancyson. The music headmistress mockingly points out how easy it is to distinguish the two. After noticing that Squidward does not have a unibrow, he is quickly arrested for "impersonating a genius," leaving SpongeBob and Patrick alone with the metronome ticking. Soon after, they are in a trance again, imitating the metronome, as the episode ends.



 ) Production music
 ) Original music
 ) SpongeBob music

  Cream Pie - Sage Guyton, Jeremy Wakefield [Title card.]
  Choir Boys 4 - Nicolas Carr, Steve Marston [Exterior of the recital hall.]
  Dancing In Dreamland (A) - Ron Goodwin ["Thank you, thank you."]
  Hawaiian Link (B) - Richard Myhill ["All right, I've had enough."]
  Witty Fellow - Gerhard Trede [Squidward is mistaken for Squilliam.]
  Lap Steel - Nicolas Carr [Exterior of prestigious music college.]
  Harpsichord Upper Crust - Nicolas Carr, Ron Wasserman [Squidward enters wearing a wig.]
  Wooden Bear - Gil Flat, Tony Tape, Florian Voelxen [Class begins.]
  Goofy Conversation - Nicolas Carr, Barry Anthony [SpongeBob and Patrick appear.]
  Lap Steel - Nicolas Carr [SpongeBob's muscular legs.]
  Harpsichord Scene Transition - Nicolas Carr, Ron Wasserman [Transition to next scene.]
  Harpsichord Fooling Around - Nicolas Carr, Ron Wasserman [SpongeBob laughs.]
  Harpsichord Sneaky Silly - Nicolas Carr, Ron Wasserman [SpongeBob interrupting Squidward.]
  Harpsichord Fooling Around - Nicolas Carr, Ron Wasserman ["SpongeBob, do you mind?!"]
  Harpsichord Tick Tock Walk - Nicolas Carr, Ron Wasserman ["You expect me to believe he was tickling himself?"]
  Steel Licks 46 - Jeremy Wakefield [SpongeBob tickling himself.]
  Harpsichord Scene Transition 2 - Nicolas Carr, Ron Wasserman [Desks arranged in one row.]
  Steel Licks 35 - Jeremy Wakefield [SpongeBob interrupts again.]
  Nude Sting - Nicolas Carr [Squidward looks shocked.]
  Spongefoolery - Nicolas Carr, Steve Marston [Squidward writing on the chalkboard.]
  Skipping to School - Sage Guyton, Jeremy Wakefield [Patrick's locomotive.]
  Steel Licks 40 - Jeremy Wakefield [Taking out the trash.]
  Harpsichord Fooling Around - Nicolas Carr, Ron Wasserman ["Where were... we?"]
  Steel Licks 22 - Jeremy Wakefield [Metronome.]
  Mists Of Illusion - Gilbert Vinter [SpongeBob and Patrick hypnotized by the metronome.]
  Dave Allen At Large - Alan Hawkshaw [News reporter appears.]
  Tomfoolery - David Snell ["Please ignore them."]
  New Vibe Hits - Nicolas Carr [They snap out of it.]
  Goofy Conversation - Nicolas Carr, Barry Anthony ["You want to know what happened?"]
  Drama Link (G) - Hubert Clifford ["No! You're not going anywhere!"]
  Steel Licks 18 - Jeremy Wakefield [Squidward gets hit by the door.]
  12th St Rag - Sage Guyton, Jeremy Wakefield [Squidward arrested/Ending]




  • The episode is part of the first three episodes of a premiere event called the "SpongeBob Triple Play."
  • In the beginning, Squidward is wearing the same sweater that he wears in "Snowball Effect."
  • The Bikini Bottom Prestigious Music College head matron speaks with an off-Indian accent, and her friend speaks with an off-English accent.
  • The plot of this episode is somewhat similar to the plot of "Artist Unknown." This time, SpongeBob is not the only student in Squidward's class, as Patrick and some other fish appear in his class as well.
  • The metronome that SpongeBob and Patrick use moves at 120 BPM.
  • The real name for "impersonating someone" is called "identity theft."
  • Both this episode and its sister episode, "Shuffleboarding," involve the law being broken in some sort of way.
  • This is the second episode where the title card is written on a chalkboard. The first is "New Student Starfish."
    • Also, both of these episodes involve school and education.
  • This is the second episode where Squidward gets arrested. The first was "Good Ol' Whatshisname."
  • This is the second episode to show or mention hypnosis. The first is "Fear of a Krabby Patty."
  • This is the last episode to play "Mists Of Illusion."

Dub facts[]

  • In the Bahasa Indonesia version, the first half of the school scene where Squidward starts the class until SpongeBob and Patrick enter the classroom is omitted due to time constraints.

Cultural references[]

  • After being "hypnotized" by the metronome, SpongeBob and Patrick say, "My whole life has been pointed in one direction" and "I see that now. There's never been any choice for me" respectively. These are a reference to the 1976 film Taxi Driver, in which the protagonist says the same lines.


Professor Squidward 006

Incidental F9's missing dress.