Patchy the Pirate is the live-action host of the show. He presents many special episodes and Nickelodeon commercials from his small home in Encino, California. His co-host is his sarcastic pet parrot Potty, who tends to start arguments and cause trouble. Patchy is portrayed by SpongeBob's voice actor, Tom Kenny.
Patchy is the self-appointed president of the fictional SpongeBob SquarePants fan club, which he founded himself. His house is filled with SpongeBob-themed items such as plush toys, collectibles, bedspreads, and pillows. Patchy's other belongings are all pirate-themed, like a wooden boat on wheels that he uses instead of a car.
Patchy is an intentional stereotypical pirate character. He has an eye patch and hook, which he frequently switches between eyes and hands, respectively. Patchy also has a black beard and wears a hat and other pirate accessories. In "The Sponge Who Could Fly," it is inferred that he must remove his hook and peg leg in order to take a shower. Patchy even has a spare foot, for when he goes outside. He is able to recover from virtually any injury, such as being shot out of cannon and being bit by a dinosaur.
He co-hosts specials with his pet parrot, Potty, a string puppet whose strings are clearly shown and is known for being poorly controlled by the puppeteer. They tend to not get along, such as in "Ugh," where they fight over whether prehistory or the future is better. His next door neighbor, an elderly woman named Mrs. Johnson, has been known to help him out and is shown to be a motherly figure to him and Potty. Patchy says he became president of the Fan Club by electing himself and accepting graciously.
The live-action segments featuring Patchy and Potty typically appear at the beginning and end of the show, as well as immediately before or after commercial breaks. A logo sequence featuring Patchy appears at the start of "Have You Seen This Snail?," "Pest of the West," and "What Ever Happened to SpongeBob?," identifying the episode as "a SpongeBob SquarePants special." Often, these segments will reflect the theme of the SpongeBob episode; in "Ugh," Patchy attempts to host the show in a prehistoric setting but is invaded by Potty's futuristic technology, and in "Friend or Foe," Patchy and Potty work in a fast food restaurant where they end up becoming enemies.
Other times, Patchy does things to seem more natural reflecting the episode. In "Christmas Who?," he was getting ready for Christmas. In the first airing of "Shanghaied," he hosted a voting contest in which the viewers got to pick the ending, via the phone or the internet. After the voting ended, it got changed to "Patchy's Pick," where he announces the episodes name, and opens fan mail. In "It's a SpongeBob Christmas!," he and Potty steal a mail truck delivering letters to Santa, and end up getting lost. In "Truth or Square," he tries to find some celebrities for his "10th Anniversary of SpongeBob" special, an event that was happening at the time.
Apart from special episodes themselves, Patchy has appeared in several Nickelodeon special events. Leading up to the premiere of "Have You Seen This Snail?," Patchy and Tony Hawk look for Gary by following a slime trail. Patchy ended up on Friday Night Slimetime, while Tony ended up in Times Square. Patchy hosted the Best Day Ever marathon on a boat in New York City harbor. In his opinion, Chicago is the best city ever. While hosting the marathon, he played chess with his teddy bear (and lost), read magazines (including one about Jessica Alba), and wrote in his diary with a seahorse pen. He also revealed that he had an extreme childhood fear of seahorses, and thereby was frightened by his pen. He also read books, drank hot cocoa, and ate cookies. He later fell asleep at midnight, and missed #85, "Shell of a Man." He is still asleep after this episode, with his hook in his mouth. In the middle of the night, Patchy woke up to announce #61, "Suds" and came up the excuse that he was "resting his eyes." However, he was mumbling and stumbling over his words in the process as a sign that he was half-asleep and, ironically, skipped numbers 62-73. After that he went back to sleep and did not fully wake up until after #43, "Nature Pants," when his alarm clock rang at 8 a.m. He had Pirate Flakes cereal and Orange Juice for breakfast. He also got a back massage, and told the viewers about the Empire State Building. Patchy hosted the Z to A countdown from the Bahamas starting at 5:00 p.m. on November 12, 2007. It was revealed that he cannot swim, but he still went through with an underwater talk show to present "Atlantis SquarePantis." In The Ultimate SpongeBob SpongeBash, Patchy is the DJ at the "party." Patchy also appeared in the Big Time Rush special, "Big Time Beach Party," searching for his family's lost treasure. It is revealed that Patchy is a big fan of Big Time Rush, revealed behind the scenes of "Big Time Beach Party."
Shower In A Can!
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"Hey, kids, I hope you enjoyed the show, because it's time for you to walk the plank!"
"Well, if it isn't my less than amusing sidekick, Potty the Parrot."
"Get me out of here, you scurvy bird!"
"Ahoy! It's a SpongeBob SquarePants Special!"
"And my instructional video series, only $29.95 ($40.00 value)
"Get off my lawn!"
Patchy has had the most screen time, individual lines, and major roles out of all of the supporting characters.
He was one of the main guests of Nickelodeon's series U-Pick Live and appeared in many segments.
He and Potty are the only major live-action characters in the series.
Patchy had his beard as a kid.
Patchy is currently the only character in the franchise to guest appear in another series.
In "Truth or Square," Patchy doesn't have a peg leg and actually has two legs. After a few appearances of Patchy, the cast realized how hard using the peg-leg was for Tom Kenny and just let him walk on two legs.
Patchy owns a lot of SpongeBob comic books, which are obviously based on actual comics.
According to an issue of Nickelodeon Magazine, Patchy admires pirates like Captain Jack Sparrow, Captain Hook, and more.
Patchy once got to the dumpster of Krusty Krab, as the words "Patchy was here" can be seen on it in "Sailor Mouth."
When the gorilla was throwing food at him in "Friend or Foe," you can hear Patchy say "I have a tomato allergy."
Patchy has a hook hand very much like Captain Hook from the Disney film, Peter Pan.
In the current aired version of "Shanghaied," Patchy's lips sometimes don't match with what he is saying. This is because, in the current rerun version of the episode, some scenes are edited down and dubbed over, due to the originally aired version being a contest where people were able to select one of the three alternate endings 'live' by calling an on-screen number, which is no longer in service.
He also has a 8-track tape called "Frampton Comes Alive." It breaks during a traffic jam when he tries to put on some music. Later, it gets fixed until it breaks once again.
In the Croatian dub, his name is "Jednooki Pirat," which translates to "One-Eyed Pirate."
Patchy makes an appearance in the Big Time Rush episode "Big Time Beach Party."