- [Mr. Krabs is seen playing on the piano and is about to sing a song.]
- Mr. Krabs: ♪You eat me krusty products, every one you see. From the Krabby Patt-A to the Krabby Patt-Z. Well this here little ditty's a walk down memory lane. To stimulate the money spending center of your brain.♪
- [Mr. Krabs takes out a coin and puts it through the slot in his head like a piggy bank. Patrick is lowered down by a rope. But the rope snaps and Patrick falls on the stage. As Mr. Krabs sings, Patrick eats various types of Krabby Patties.]
- Mr. Krabs: ♪You love me double patties, and the triple patty's fun. Me favorite's the patty-free patty made cheap, it's just a bun. You bought the hatty patty to cover your lack of hair, you tried the briefy patty when you needed underwear!♪
- [Patrick throws money around and eats some more Krabby Patties.]
- Mr. Krabs: ♪Buy some, buy some, buy some Krabby Patties! Buy some, buy some, buy some Krabby Patties! Remember the plaidy patty? Painted up so nice! You'll like me newest patty more, it's frozen up in ice.♪
- [The patty balls dance in a line. They pull the curtain and Patrick is seen near a microwave. Then Krabby Patties fall down on him. Patrick eats some more patties until he starts to feel sick. He slides down and reveals to not have his pants on.]
- Mr. Krabs: ♪With frozen Krabby Patties, in your freezer aisle, you can make your own right at home pantsless all the while. Buy some, buy some frozen Krabby Patties! Buy some, buy some frozen Krabby Patties!♪ [laughs] Buy some frozen Krabby Patties! With your money! 'Cause I want it! Right now!
- [Mr. Krabs takes a bow and the crowd cheers.]
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