Encyclopedia SpongeBobia
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Encyclopedia SpongeBobia

This article is a transcript of the SpongeBob SquarePants episode "Goo Goo Gas" from season 5, which aired on July 19, 2009.

  • [It is a normal day at the Krusty Krab. All of a sudden, Plankton, disguised as a peppershaker, steals a Krabby Patty from Incidental 105.]
  • Plankton: Ha-ha! [runs out of the Krusty Krab. However, Mr. Krabs picks him up from behind]
  • Mr. Krabs: Hold it right there, Plankton.
  • Plankton: Krabs!
  • Mr. Krabs: I'll take that. [takes the Krabby Patty from him]
  • Plankton: How'd you know it was me?
  • Mr. Krabs: Next time, wear a disguise without your initial on it.
  • Plankton: Hmmm... perhaps a peppershaker was a bit obvious.
  • Mr. Krabs: You think? SpongeBob! [SpongeBob runs onto the scene]
  • SpongeBob: Wooo-ooo! [Krabs puts Plankton in his mouth, his eyes turn into numbers counting down]
  • Announcer: [off-screen] 3, 2, 1ā€¦, launch! [SpongeBob launches Plankton out of his hat and through the Chum Bucket roof]
  • Plankton: Aahh!
  • [Cut to the park. Plankton is on a bench]
  • Plankton: Never! Never! I'll never get Krabs' formula! Mr. Krabs is too powerful. If only there were a way to render him helpless!
  • Incidental 49: [with her baby] Oh, look at you, you're so small, tiny and helpless.
  • Plankton: Hey, I resent that! Huh?
  • Incidental 49: [she takes the bottle from her baby] Why, you're so tiny and helpless, I could take your formula whenever I wanted to and you couldn't do a thing about it. [the baby starts crying, Incidental 49 puts the bottle back into her baby's mouth and moves on]
  • Plankton: Something about that woman reminds me of my mother. That's it! Finally, victory will be mine! I'll turn Eugene Krabs into a powerlessā€¦ baby.
  • [Cut to Mr. Krabs walking up to his restaurant]
  • Mr. Krabs: [A penny catches his eye] Ooh, a penny. [He sees a trail of pennies] A trail of pennies! [They lead him into a phone booth outside. We see some green gas appear around Krabs.]
  • Plankton: I've done it! Nothing can stop me now! My goo goo gas will transform Krabs into a tiny helpless infant! [He opens the phone booth, and grabs the key.] The key to the Krusty Krab. This is easier than I hoped. [Looks at baby Krabs] He's a little bigger than I imagined. [baby Krabs takes the key and swings it up and down] Whoa! [baby Krabs puts Plankton into his mouth and starts biting him] No, no! Ow, ow, ow! Oof! [baby Krabs then sucks on Plankton, and releases him] Whoa! [Plankton runs for the front doors of the Krusty Krab, with baby Krabs following behind him, but he can't reach.]
  • SpongeBob: Hey, a baby! What are you doing out here all alone, baby? I'll take charge of you until your mommy shows up! [baby Krabs giggles] Oh, aren't you just too cute. [tickles baby Krabs] Coochie coochie coo! [they both laugh]
  • Plankton: Hello! If you're done making a total fool out of yourself, I could use some help with this lock.
  • SpongeBob: Oh, sure thing, Plankton. [places baby Krabs on top of him] Here you go, little guy. [places the key inside the door]
  • Plankton: Yes, my plan is working perfectly! Now that I've turned Krabs into a helpless baby, the Krabby Patty formula will be mine! [laughs, stops then notices SpongeBob staring at him] Hello.
  • SpongeBob: [looking at Plankton after hearing what he just said] Police! Police!
  • Plankton: [getting arrested] Fools, you'll never hold me! Your primitive shackles are no match for my genius. [the cuffs are too wide, and he easily escapes, dropping to the ground before running away, with the police on pursuit] That was easy. I'm free! Free!
  • [Squidward walks up to the Krusty Krab, looking glum as always]
  • SpongeBob: Oh, Squidward. Thank Neptune you're here. I found this baby all alone. But he wasn't really alone, he was with Plankton! And he's not a baby! [SpongeBob shows Squidward baby Krabs] It's Mr. Krabs! Plankton turned him into an infant so he could steal the Krabby Patty formula! [baby Krabs burps in Squidward's face] What do we do, Squidward?
  • Squidward: I don't know about you, but I'm going on my coffee break. A very long coffee break. [walks away]
  • Plankton: [back at the Chum Bucket, talking to Karen] ā€¦and then that blasted sponge called the cops! That's just not cricket. [pouts] Now I'll never be a tyrannical overlord.
  • Karen: Do I have to tell you how to do everything? Next time, spray SpongeBob, too.
  • Plankton: Not sure I follow you.
  • Karen: Listen carefully. Spray...
  • Plankton: Yes.
  • Karen: ...Sponge...
  • Plankton: Uh-huh.
  • Karen: ...Bob...
  • Plankton: Right.
  • Karen: ...Too!
  • Plankton: Now you're just talking gibberish. What I really need is to spray Mr. Krabs and SpongeBob.
  • Karen: Ugh! That's just what I...
  • Plankton: I don't wanna hear anymore of your loony schemes, Karen. I've got work to do!
  • [Back at the Krusty Krab, baby Krabs starts to cry.]
  • SpongeBob: Aw, what's wrong, Mr. Baby Krabs? Are you thirsty? [gives him some milk and he stops crying] That's it, drink up! [baby Krabs spits out the bottle and he continues to cry] Okay, maybe you're hungry? [runs off and quickly returns with a Krabby Patty] How about a nice soft Krabby Patty? [baby Krabs slaps it away and continues to cry] Yikes, not even a Krabby Patty helps. [reaches into his pocket] How about a stack of $20s? [shows a stack of $20 bills; Krabs takes it and chews on it]
  • Plankton: Hands in the air!
  • SpongeBob: Plankton!
  • Plankton: [pops up at the scene, with a gas tank behind his back] That's right, SpongeBob, I'm back! And you won't stop me this time. [starts to spray. Mr. Krabs turns back into an adult, wearing a diaper, and SpongeBob turns into a baby] What? SpongeBob's a baby, but Krabs is back to normal? [sprays again. Mr. Krabs returns to his baby form as SpongeBob returns to normal, but is still wearing a rectangular diaper and is barefoot] It seems the second dose acts as an antidote! [sprays only SpongeBob, and he is turned back into a baby again] One squirt equals baby, two squirts equals adult! [sprays both of them once, and they come back to normal. They're still wearing their diapers] Or is it three squirts for baby and four squirts for adults? [tries to spray them, but nothing comes out] Barnacles, I've run out of gas!
  • Mr. Krabs: Ahem!
  • Plankton: Krabs! Nice diaper. [Mr. Krabs is about to throw him] Hold on, hold on! I think I... [throws him like a slingshot pellet; cut to Plankton flying in the air] Yes, I've got it!
  • Mr. Krabs: [checking the mailbox] Better be something other than bills in here. [Plankton comes out] Plankton!
  • Plankton: Peek-a-boo!
  • Mr. Krabs: [running back in the Krusty Krab] I can't tolerate your stinky gas!
  • Incidental 92: [farts]
  • Incidental 93: That makes two of us. [drinks her cup]
  • Incidental 92: I don't do it on purpose!
  • Mr. Krabs: You'll never catch me, Plankton! Never! [notices a penny on the ground] Oohā€¦another penny! Come to papa! Now, what were we doing?
  • Plankton: This! [sprays him] What's the matter, baby? Are you gonna cry? [Mr. Krabs has turned into a senior citizen] What the heck happened to you? This isn't baby gas, it's senior citizen spray!
  • Mr. Krabs: Eh? What was that, sonny?
  • Plankton: Out of my way, Methuselah! You're old and useless. [SpongeBob comes out of nowhere]
  • SpongeBob: Hold it right there! Old people are out greatest natural resource! I salute you, elder citizenry!
  • Plankton: I'm getting old listening to this. Let's try this again! [sprays the gas on SpongeBob, turning him into a senior citizen]
  • SpongeBob: I remember when a quarter used to cost a nickel. [laughs]
  • Plankton: This baby gas is worthless! [throws the spray fan away] At least you're way too old to stop me from stealing a Krabby Patty!
  • SpongeBob: What was that, sonny?
  • Plankton: It'll take more time to explain than you have left. [walks away; runs back out with a Krabby Patty]
  • SpongeBob: What?
  • Mr. Krabs: [sniffs] He's got the Krabby Patty! Catch him!
  • SpongeBob: Catch who?
  • Mr. Krabs: Oh, Gesundheit.
  • Plankton: Victory is mine! [the bottom of the walkers cause Plankton to jump]
  • SpongeBob: Come back here, you little whippersnapper!
  • Mr. Krabs: You kids get off my lawn! I'll catch up with you, boy!
  • SpongeBob: [knitting] I'm catching up with my knitting.
  • Mr. Krabs: [hatches an idea] That's it! Knit, little nitwit!
  • Plankton: That was almost too easy. [Plankton is caught in a knitwear net] What? No! I demand you geezers release me!
  • Mr. Krabs: Right after the party. The piƱata party. [A group of senior citizens show up]
  • Plankton: What?
  • Senior citizens: [beating Plankton with their canes and walkers] That's for calling us old.
  • Plankton: Hey, quit it!
  • Senior citizens: I want candy!
  • Plankton: No!
  • [Cut to the Chum Bucket, with Plankton in his lab, writing something on a chalk board.]
  • Plankton: One squirt plus adult... carry the two... gas vector minus body weight, mm hmm... square root of SpongeBob. Of course! The final ingredient that I've been lacking! It's so simple yet so evil! And I know just the place to get it.
  • [Cut to Barg'N-Mart]
  • Plankton: Excuse me, what aisle did you get that from?
  • Incidental 45: You mean the Kelp-O?
  • Plankton: No, that thing--the ugly, drippy, smelly thing.
  • Incidental 45: Are you talking about my baby!? Creep![Chases Plankton with her cart. She ends up squashing him by running him over.]
  • Plankton: Ow, ow, ow! [moans in pain, then notices a shelf full of baby powder] Baby powder? This could be just what I need! [to Incidental 73] Hey, buddy, is this made of real or artificial babies? [Incidental 45 squishes Plankton again with her cart.] Ow, ow, ow, ow! [Cut to the Chum Bucket] That powdered baby did the trick! Now my baby gas can't possibly fail!
  • Karen: Just like all your other plans that "couldn't possibly fail"?
  • Plankton: What is it now, Karen?
  • Karen: I'm saying you should test your gas before you run over there all willy nilly!
  • Plankton: That's an excellent idea. And I know just the guinea pig! [Grabs the pack and points it at Karen]
  • Karen: [gasps] Plankton, don't you dare! [sprays her and a calculator falls to the ground]
  • Plankton: Karen! Speak to me! [the calculator types in "hello" as 07734 upside down] It worked!
  • [Cut to the Krusty Krab, where the old Mr. Krabs is drinking a soda]
  • Plankton: Everyone say your ABCs! [sprays Incidentals 41 and 47, turning them into babies] Now when you turn into babiesā€¦ [they both start crying] ā€¦you stay babies! [Plankton sprays Incidentals 2 and 63] Hey, Krabs, catch! [throws a gas bomb which turns Mr. Krabs into a baby, who starts crying. SpongeBob comes out of the kitchen]
  • SpongeBob: What's wrong, little feller? [A gas bomb is thrown at him and explodes, turning him into a baby. They both cry.]
  • [Cut to an aerial view of the Krusty Krab where everyone is turning into babies, and they begin crying. Even Patrick is seen turning into a baby. Squidward opens the bathroom door and sees what's going on, then walks away. A gas bomb explodes in the bathroom turning Squidward into a crying baby.]
  • Plankton: My moment of triumph! [slips on some drool] Whoa! What the...? [SpongeBob, Krabs, and Squidward are drooling over Plankton] Oh, gross! I command you to stop drooling on me!
  • Baby Mr. Krabs: Goo!
  • Plankton: [he yelps. Baby Mr. Krabs grabs Plankton.] Put me down! [baby Mr. Krabs just shakes him playfully like a rattle] Ow! [shakes him again] Stop it! I'm an adult! [SpongeBob grabs him and starts sucking on him like a pacifier. Spits him out into Patrick's diaper. Patrick farts as he laughs and Plankton runs away from him, screaming] Huh? I don't believe it! [Plankton sees Krabs sucking on the secret formula bottle] The Krabby Patty formula! He's teething on it! Give it here, you big stupid baby! [baby Krabs smashes Plankton with the bottle] Ow! [he squishes him four more times as Incidental 64Baby laughs. As baby Mr. Krabs crawls away, Plankton emerges, groaning in pain] I've got it! Just like taking candy from a baby! Get it, Krabs? I'm taking candy from you! [baby SpongeBob starts playing with the gas tank by repeatedly banging it against the ground] Hey! what are you doing?! [the gas tank rises into the air like a rocket ship and releases gas everywhere, which sprays onto Plankton] Uh-oh. [he shrinks into microscopic size with amoebas floating around, clears throat, he covers himself] Mama's evil little genius needs a diaper!
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