Gary's Got Legs/transcript

This article is a transcript of the SpongeBob SquarePants episode "Gary's Got Legs" from season 12, which aired on July 27, 2019.

[The episode begins with SpongeBob and Gary doing their morning exercises. SpongeBob stretches his legs really long and Gary stretches his eyestalks. They lose their balance and fall over.]
SpongeBob: Okay, that's enough stretching.
Gary: Meow.
SpongeBob: Now we're ready for a morning jog.
Gary: Meow!
[SpongeBob puts the leash on Gary's snail and goes to walk him. But Gary pulls him back and crashes into SpongeBob.]
SpongeBob: What's the matter, Gary? Don't you like jogging?
Gary: Meow, meow, meow.
SpongeBob: Oh, right. You're a snail. Hm. We've got to find a way to get you moving.
[The scene changes to SpongeBob creating a tank for Gary to ride on.]
SpongeBob: [picks Gary up] This should do it. [places Gary on the tank] You'll "tank" me later. [laughs]
[SpongeBob jogs in place and the tank begins to move. Then they both proceed their morning jog.]
SpongeBob: Hey, now you're moving.
[Suddenly, the tank malfunctions and begins to drive out of control.]
Gary: Meow, meow!
SpongeBob: [gets run over by the tank] Whoa—ow! [appears flattened and injured] I'm okay. [gets run over again] Ow! [gets run over again] Ow! [gets run over again] Yow!
[The tank repeatedly runs over SpongeBob until he is completely flattened. The tank crashes into the lamppost, sending Gary flying.]
Gary: Meow! [lands upside-down on his shell]
[Gary tries to get himself up, but fails. SpongeBob pulls out a sponge-shaped cookie cutter and cuts himself free. He then rushes over to Gary.]
SpongeBob: Aww, poor Gary. [picks up Gary] Looks like you could use a leg up. [comes up with an idea] Or maybe two.
[Gary whimpers in worry. The scene changes to SpongeBob making something out of wood with some wood-carving tools.]
SpongeBob: [removes goggles] There! A perfect set of legs. [reveals to have made a wooden table as he blows the wood dust off] Now let's make some for you.
[The scene changes to SpongeBob wearing a doctor's mask and Gary is on the operating table.]
SpongeBob: This will only hurt for a second. [pulls his legs off] Yow! [reproduces new legs and pushes the button to activate the table]
Gary: [flies upward] Meow! [lands on his shell and SpongeBob places the legs underneath Gary] Meow.
SpongeBob: [kicks the table away and sets Gary down] Voilà! What do you think, Gary?
Gary: [looks at his new legs] Me—ow, meow—meow.
SpongeBob: Let's try 'em out. Come on. Come to SpongeBob.
Gary: Hm. [struggles to walk, but is having a hard time]
SpongeBob: Oh, your first steps.
Gary: Meow. [nearly falls over but continues to walk]
SpongeBob: My little guy's growing up. [catches Gary after successfully walking to him] Now let's try something a little harder.
[SpongeBob bends his legs up and down. Gary does the same. SpongeBob does some kicks with his legs.]
Gary: [does some kicks with his new legs] Meow, meow, meow.
SpongeBob: Ooh, not bad. Try this. [performs an Irish jig]
Gary: [performs an Irish jig with his new legs] Meow, meow, meow, meooow!
SpongeBob: Nice moves. [does the Irish jig with Gary, but ends up getting his feet tangled] Ow! [falls over] Ah! [gasps] The student has surpassed the master.
[The scene changes to SpongeBob preparing another walk with Gary to show off his new legs.]
SpongeBob: Ready to stretch your stuff, Gare-bear?
Gary: Meow, meow. [begins running with his new legs] Meow!
SpongeBob: Hey, wait! [gets dragged by Gary] Whoa!
Gary: Meow, meow. [stops at the gate of the snail park]
SpongeBob: Oh! [flips over and backward] Oy. [gets himself up and removes Gary's leash] After you.
Gary: Meow, meow.
[SpongeBob and Gary enter the snail park. As they wonder around, the people and their pets look in awe at Gary's new limbs. They had never seen a snail with legs before.]
SpongeBob: Oh, yeah, that's right. You're not dreaming. Check it out. Snail with legs, people.
[SpongeBob and Gary walk up to Lady Upturn and her snail.]
Gary: Meow. [winks at Lady Upturn's snail and growls flirtatiously]
[Lady Upturn's snail purrs daintily.]
Bikini Bottomites: Would you look at that. Well, that's certainly different.
[A worm looks at Gary's new legs and sniffs at them. Gary hisses angrily and the worm barks back at the legged snail. Gary kicks the worm with his new legs and sends the worm flying over to its owner, who gets really angry.]
SpongeBob: [gasps] Gary!
Worm owner: Hey, control your snail, fella!
SpongeBob: Sorry. Guess Gary's new legs got him a little excited.
[The worm blows a raspberry at Gary.]
Gary: [hisses angrily and kicks the worm and its owner with his new legs] Pow!
Worm owner: You'll be hearing from my lawyer! [pops in the sky]
[The other people and their pets see this and get really angry.]
Bikini Bottomites: What is your problem, man?
[Just when the people and their pets are about to beat them up, Gary uses his new legs to kick them. Gary goes to beat up the other people with his new legs.]
SpongeBob: Oh, wh—s—sorry!
[Everyone runs out of the snail park in fear.]
Fred: His legs!
SpongeBob: Gary the snail, that was very naughty!
Gary: [licks SpongeBob's hand] Meow.
SpongeBob: Oh. [laughs] I can't stay mad at you. [pets Gary and puts the leash back on his shell]
Gary: [runs off with his new legs] Meow!
SpongeBob: [gets pulled forward] Whoa!
[Gary pulls SpongeBob really hard until he reaches to the pineapple house's front door. SpongeBob collapses from exhaustion.]
SpongeBob: [tries to open the door, but is too tired] I'm a little beat, Gary. Can you give me a hand with the door?
Gary: Meow—ow. [tries to open the door, but ends up getting his eyestalks tangled]
SpongeBob: Looks like I should give you a hand, huh?
[The scene changes to SpongeBob examining Gary with a measuring tape.]
SpongeBob: Hm? Hm. Hmm. [produces two extra arms for Gary] Uh-huh. Uh-huh. [takes the arms] Yow! [breaks them apart and sticks them onto Gary] They look a little tight in the shoulder.
Gary: [looks at his new arms] Meow—meow, meow—meow. [points out that SpongeBob gave him two left-handed arms]
SpongeBob: Whoops! I accidentally gave you two left hands. [pulls the pinky and makes it into the perfect right hand] Boop! Perfect. Give 'em a test drive, Gary.
Gary: [struggles to move his new arms] Meow, meow, meow... [his arms fall downward; he tries to pull them up, but they're too heavy]
SpongeBob: Maybe you just need some motivation. [holds out a can of snail food]
Gary: Meow. [struggles to move his new arms to reach for the can of snail food, but squeezes SpongeBob's eyes by accident] Meow!
SpongeBob: [yelps in pain] You're doing it, Gary. Yes, yes! Keep it up, keep it up! [get slapped in the face by Gary's new arms] Ow! Yes, yes!
Gary: [slaps SpongeBob's face] Meow!
SpongeBob: That's it, Gary. [gets slapped again] Move the— [gets slapped again] Move the— [gets slapped again] Move those arms.
[The scene changes to Gary trying out various things with his new arms.]
Gary: Meow—ow—ow—ow—ow—ow. [flips the light switch on and off; then he goes to open the front door and sees Patrick] Meow? [slams the door before Patrick could say anything] Meow.
[Gary happily runs up and down the stairs while carrying SpongeBob and laughing. Gary then feeds SpongeBob some food in the kitchen. He imitates a train sound before stuffing SpongeBob's mouth with the food. SpongeBob talks to Gary with his mouth full. He points out that he can't chew his food on his own.]
Gary: [annoyed] Meow. [moves SpongeBob's mouth up and down to help him chew the food]
French Narrator: One Weekend of Pampering Later...
[SpongeBob is shown resting on the couch with a blanket. Gary gives SpongeBob a cup of hot chocolate and sits next to him to watch some television. Suddenly, SpongeBob's head starts to shake.]
SpongeBob: Ow! [sticks out his tongue and sees an alarm clock ringing] Yikes! Look at the time! I gotta get to the Krusty Krab. [throws the clock away] Thanks for spoiling me, Gary. I didn't have to lift a "finger." [pulls the blanket off and sees his own limbs old and worn out] My fingers... [goes to walk] Wha—! [but falls over] A whole weekend of pampering has left my limbs in limbo. [drags across the floor with his tongue] Got. To go. To work. [crawls over to the front door and sees his hat] Hm? [tries to reach it, but falls over; his limbs wither and curl up, leaving SpongeBob completely motionless] Too weak to flip Krabby Patties. [whimpers]
[Gary walks over to SpongeBob. He takes pity on poor SpongeBob for having his limbs become worn out from all the pampering.]
Gary: [sympathetically] Ooh. Uh-oh.
[The scene changes to the Krusty Krab. The customers are eating their patties, but they find snail slime on them, much to their disgust. One customer eats it, but becomes grossed out. He walks over to Mr. Krabs.]
Customer #1: Excuse me, but I would like to complain!
Mr. Krabs: I see. Well, the Krusty Krab takes customers feedback very seriously, sir. After they pay the $5.00 complaint fee.
Customer #1: All right, fine. [reluctantly gives Mr. Krabs $5.00]
Mr. Krabs: Yee—hee—hee—hee. [turns his head and places the dollar in it] Thank you, sir. Now what seems to be your problem?
Customer #1: There is slime on my patty!
Customer #2: And mine has—[eats his slime-covered patty] slime on it, too.
Incidental 20: My patty doesn't have enough slime! [laughs]
Mr. Krabs: What? Give me that. [eats the slime-covered patty, but spits it out] Bleh! Ugh! Gah! SpongeBob! Just what do you think you're doing [enters the kitchen] changing me patty... [sees Gary at the grill] formula?
Gary: [tips his hat] Meow. Meow—mow. [flips patties but leaves a mess of slime]
Mr. Krabs: Squidward! Why is there a mollusk cooking me Krabby Patties?
Squidward: I thought it was strangely quiet and peaceful today.
Mr. Krabs: Where the halibut is SpongeBob?
Squidward: Maybe he quit? Or got hit by a bus?! Or caught a terminal disease!
Mr. Krabs: I don't care if he turned into a bucket of chum. I need me fry cook! [leaves to go check on SpongeBob] Mr. Squidward, you have the helm. [exits the restaurant]
Squidward: [speaks through megaphone] Attention Krusty Krab customers: Get out. It's time for my break.
[The customers leave the restaurant. Mr. Krabs knocks on the front door to SpongeBob's house.]
Mr. Krabs: SpongeBob! SpongeBob? SpongeBob? Are you okay in there? You catch the flu or something? Ugh. Are you at death's door? Because you know darn well they ain't valid excuses to miss work! [peeks through the window and finds to his shocking surprise that SpongeBob is slithering on the floor with his tongue like a snail; SpongeBob eats some food from Gary's food bowl] Ah! SpongeBob has gone full raving loony. [hears something] Uh-oh! [hides underground as Gary appears]
Gary: ♪Meow—meow—meow—meow—meow—meow—meow. Meow—meow—meow—meow—meow—meow.♪ [enters the house]
[Mr. Krabs peeks through the window again. He sees SpongeBob rubbing his head against the chair while Gary's reading the paper. Gary pets SpongeBob and holds out a snail toy for him to play. SpongeBob plays the toy with his eye. Mr. Krabs gasps and drills himself inside through the floor.]
Gary: Meow?
Mr. Krabs: What in the name of Neptune's nostrils is going on in here?! SpongeBob, you're acting like you're the pet and that darn snail is the owner!
Gary: [hits Mr. Krabs with the toy] Meow! Meow—meow—meow.
Mr. Krabs: [grabs the toy] Bad snail! Down boy! [gets attacked by SpongeBob] SpongeBob, what are you—[gets licked and pummeled by SpongeBob until he pushes him off and shakes him violently] Oh, snap out of it, SpongeBob!
[SpongeBob doesn't respond. Mr. Krabs pulls out a Krabby Patty, breaks it in half and puts it under SpongeBob's nose. SpongeBob smells the patty's scent and shakes himself back to normal, snapping himself out of the strange trance.]
SpongeBob: [dazed] Mr. Krabs?
Mr. Krabs: Have you completely lost your mind, boy-o? Snails ain't supposed to have arms and legs.
SpongeBob: Aww, but Gary is so happy with his new limbs.
[Gary files his new arms.]
Mr. Krabs: Oh, is he? Well, it's time to cut this nonsense! [growls and goes to fight Gary] Ay! [growls at Gary viciously] Huh-hah!
[Mr. Krabs leaps over to Gary and cuts the arms and legs, returning Gary back to his normal self.]
Gary: [sniffs the severed limbs] Meow. [slithers over to his food bowl, removes SpongeBob's name and goes to eat his food]
SpongeBob: Mr. Krabs, I'm sorry I forgot who I was.
Mr. Krabs: That's okay, boy-o.
SpongeBob: And Gary, I am so sorry I tried to change you.
[Gary belches and proceeds to eat his food.]
SpongeBob: And Patrick, I'm sorry I haven't returned your hat yet. [shows an enormous hat with a train on it]
Patrick: [sobs quietly and hugs SpongeBob before getting his hat back] It's okay... [leaves]
SpongeBob: [sees the severed limbs walking away] Hm? [grabs a severed arm] Well, I guess I shouldn't let these go to waste. I can always use an extra hand [laughs]
Mr. Krabs: [picks up SpongeBob] All right, all right. That's enough Sponge-bobbery for today, boy-o. [holds out the spatula] Time to get you flipping patties again. [leaves for the Krusty Krab with SpongeBob]
[The scene changes to nighttime and SpongeBob and Gary are getting ready for bed.]
SpongeBob: Ah, sure is nice having everything back to normal, isn't it Gare-bear? [climbs into bed] Yup. Same old, same old.
[After a brief silence, SpongeBob and Gary look at each other.]
Gary: Meow—ow. [slithers onto the bed while SpongeBob goes to sleep on the floor; they both sigh] Meow. Meow.
SpongeBob: Oops! Sorry. [his severed arms come out from under the bed and claps] Boop-boop.
[The lights turn off and the screen becomes black, ending the episode.]