"Dunces and Dragons" is a SpongeBob SquarePants episode from . In this episode, .

"Dunces and Dragons" is a SpongeBob SquarePants episode from Season four.

Brief summary: After a freak jousting accident, SpongeBob and Patrick travel back in time.


  • Songs:
  • Squidly's 7 songs
  • DVD:
  • Lost in Time
  • Nick Picks 6



Villiage of Bikini Bottomshire.


SpongeBob and Patrick are running up to the "Medieval Moments" stadium/restaurant to watch the jousting tournament. Upon their arrival, Morrie announces the tournament and asks for two volunteers to take part in the jousting, choosing SpongeBob and Patrick. Unaware that they are actually going to be in the tournament, and not just watching upclose, they are forced to mount seahorses and start jousting against each other. They are both launched off of their seahorses into the air, and land in a small field in a medieval Bikini Bottom.

A large group of knights on seahorses surround the duo. They lock SpongeBob and Patrick in the dungeons because they think they are witches. There they see a squid playing a clarinet. They think it's Squidward, but the squid's name is actually Squidly, who used to be the king's royal fool before he "royally messed up". SpongeBob still thinks they are in the restaurant, and comments on how authentic the "props" are. Later, SpongeBob, Patrick and Squidly are sent to the king (Mr. Krabs), who orders them to be executed because of an insulting song they sing in front of him. However, Princess Pearl reminds King Krabs of a prophecy in a stained glass window, which says that two brave knights will fall from the sky and will be sent by a king and defeat the dragon (controlled by the evil wizard Planktonimor (Plankton) that is destroying the kingdom. Just then, the dragon, a giant jellyfish smashes through the wall with the prophecy on it.

Under Planktonimor's orders, it kidnaps Pearl and effortly flicks King Krabs into the guillotine, smashing it just before SpongeBob can be executed. The dragon flies away, and King Krabs begs SpongeBob and co. to rescue her, treating them worshipfully until seeing a section of the prophecy showing him kicking out SpongeBob and Patrick. He tells them to defeat the dragon, then proceeds to kick them out. However, SpongeBob and Patrick decide to literally kick themselves out, and Squidly comes along as well after orders from King Krabs. On the way, they stop off at the Blacksmith's to get some armour and weapons, only to find that all of the weapons are too heavy except for the jellyfish net. As they reach the bridge to Planktonimor's tower, they are attacked by a

"Dark Knight", who guards the bridge. The Dark Knight is revealed to be none-other than a medieval Sandy (who, unlike the present Sandy, does not need an air helmet). A duel ensues, with SpongeBob ultimately winning due to his karate prowess. After the battle, SpongeBob decides to spare her life.

Amazed, the Dark Knight decides to follow SpongeBob, Patrick and Squidly on their quest (and learn a trifle of Karate, according to her). Back at the King's castle, Krabs receives a note saying that Princess Pearl will die if he doesn't hand over the village and his throne. SpongeBob, Patrick, Squidly and the Dark Knight make an incredibly long journey to the top of the tower, where SpongeBob distracts Planktonimor while Patrick, Squidly and the Dark Knight try to rescue Pearl. However, the Dragon soon arrives and manages to zap the heroes. Just as the Dragon is about to finish off SpongeBob, he pulls out a Krabby Patty he had been saving for lunch. The Dragon eats it and likes it so much that it becomes obedient to SpongeBob, zapping Planktonimor. The heroes return to the village to have their victory celebrated, and King Krabs is seen cooking Krabby Patties (on a modern grill) for the dragon. However, as soon as Squidly starts playing his clarinet, everybody hates it, and someone throws a rock at him. The seahorses become scared and launch SpongeBob and Patrick into the air. They land back at the tournament in present day, and SpongeBob says "I guess I shouldn't have agitated that Seahorse. That was some dream I had, eh Patrick?" Patrick then replies "Try telling that to Squidly." He then stands up, revealing a horribly squashed Squidly underneath him.Then Squidly makes this last note



  • Guard: Right this way.
SpongeBob: Excuse me, my good man, but I believeth you meanteth to say, "Righteth this way-eth!" ( giggles )
Guard: ( holds his spear up to his throat, gulps, and then puts it down ) Some day, but not today.
  • SpongeBob: Pat, do you know how to ride a seahorse?
Patrick: Nuh-uh.
SpongeBob: Mr. Seahorse sir, you go easy on beginners right? (Seahorses ride off with Patrick and SpongeBob on them)
  • Squidly: I am Squidly, the king's royal fool- or at least I was, until I royally messed up.
  • Squidly: (singing) I was the king's favourite fool, I bring merry mirth and laughter! But I told one bad joke and the king had a stroke now I hang from ye olde rafter!
  • SpongeBob: Don't you see, Patrick?! We really are in medieval times!
Patrick: Oh, no! I think I left the water running at home!
  • Karen: Planktonimor, thou art cocky and overly confident with thyself.
  • SpongeBob: ( weakly ) We're here to rescue you Pearl! Whew! Can I get a glass of water?
Planktonimor: Sparkling or regular? ( pulls bottles away ) Psyche-eth!
SpongeBob: ( gasps ) You really are the eviliest wizard in Bikini Bottomshire! Prepare to be vanquished!
Planktonimor: Bring it on-eth, knave!
  • Squidly: (singing) There once was a dragon so handsome and smart. He let me go free, for he had a big heart! ( dragon zaps him ) Everyone be-eth a critic.
  • Planktonimor: ( To Dragon Jellyfish ) YES! YES! Sick-eth them, boy!
  • SpongeBob: How's that mutton, Patrick?

Patrick: Me thinks it's mutton-tastic!

  • SpongeBob: ( To Medieval Sandy ) I must fulfill the prophecy while you untie Patrick and the royal doofus!
Squidly: That be royal fool.
  • Squidly: Ow-eth.
  • Princess Pearl: I be-eth okay.
  • SpongeBob: Wow. The boys back home will never believe this! ( After capturing the Dragon Jellyfish )
Patrick: I'm right here, and I don't believe it!
  • King Krabs: What's this? A lost piece of the prophecy?
SpongeBob: Let me guess - more praise for our manly statures?
King Krabs: Actually, it says here that I'm supposed to kick you out of here.
SpongeBob: Don't worry! We manly knights are so manly we kick ourselves out of places! ( Kicks himself out of the picture.)
  • SpongeBob: ( Takes sword from blacksmith ) It's a little heavy! ( Drops the sword and it stabs the blacksmith )
Blacksmith: ( With sword still sticking out of him ) Ha! Ha! That's going to need some stitches!
  • King Krabs: Hm. I do wonder if I couldst sell these......erm... Krabby Patties! (laughs)
  • Squidly ( singing ): Oh hear me king, for I must sing, how you are the greatest at everything, like letting a dragon burn down our city, a horrible sight that wasn't pretty. T'was all your fault and tis a pitty... You are bad, You are to blame, now hang your kingly head in shame! Lalalala lalalala lalalalalalala!
All: (singing) The king is bad! The king's to blame! Now hang your kingly head in shame! Lalalala lalalala lalalalalala!
  • Squidly ( singing ): Oh dark knight spare us please, Don't cut off our heads or boil our knees, Please take these two and let me go free, And I will give to thee some ( hesitates ) cheese. (Mooing sound)
  • Squidly:(singing) Hark, the princess!She screams from the tower. By the sounds of her cries (he removes his hat in respect) this is her final hour.
Dark Knight: Then time be of the essence. Duth thou remember the plan?(Everyone starts stuttering)
Patrick: Uh...No! (SpongeBob and Squidly look at Patrick) Uh I mean yes, yes! That's what I...said. (laughs)
Dark Knight: Then let us forge on. (The Dark Knight runs on as SpongeBob, Patrick, and Squidly shiver)


  • The title of the episode is a Parody of the role-playing game Dungeons & Dragons.
  • The name of the stadium/restaurant, Medieval Moments, is a spoof of the restaurant chain Medieval Times.
  • Karen appears as a crystal ball because of Medieval Times.
  • Burger King held a toy promotion to tie in with this episode, with figures of SpongeBob dressed as figures from different periods of time.
  • The viewing figures of this episode - 8.5 million - are some of the highest in SpongeBob's history.
  • Squidly, angered at his inability to play the clarinet properly, say "Oh blast this confounded instrument! If I never learn to play with ease, may my own great-great-great-great-great-great-great-grandson be cursed tenfold!"). This is an obvious reference to Squidward himself.
  • Nickelodeon Asia aired this episode on March 19, 2006 together with the "SpongeBob-a-thon" which premiered new episodes of SpongeBob SquarePants.
  • This episode was first seen in a New Years 2006 commercial.
  • The Lost in Time DVD was originally going to only include four episodes like the VHS version, but two episodes, "Enemy In-Law" and "Patrick SmartPants", were included on the DVD as a pair of bonus episodes.
  • The guard at the castle entrance plucks an eyelash of SpongeBob's leaving him with only two lashes on that eye. However, in later scenes, he still has three eyelashes.
  • Sandy's ancestor apparently lived in Bikini Bottom, despite her being a land animal and coming from Texas.
  • The commercial's advertising campaign refers to it as "Lost In Time" instead of its actual name, "Dunces and Dragons."
  • In Hebrew, this episode is called "קציצות ודרקונים", which means "Patties and Dragons".(Read like: Ktzitzot ve Drakonim)
  • The guillotine was not invented/named until the 1790s, and this episode takes place around 1106. Stitches were also not invented until after the renaissance.
  • On, The Dunces & Dragons game was named the "Game of the Week of the Year".
  • A knight slices SpongeBob's hat in half when they first arrive in the medieval time period, but his hat is still intact in later scenes.
  • In the Netherlands, this episode is called "Ridder SpongeBob en de draak", what means "Knight SpongeBob and the dragon".
  • The Blacksmith gets stabbed in the chest with the sword, but after he leans down to find another weapon for Spongebob, it is gone and there are no wounds.
  • Although this episode takes place in medieval times, Princess Pearl and Squidly are dressed in a Renaissance clothing.
  • The guillotine would be pretty useless on Patrick and Spongebob because Sea stars grow back their limbs, and sponges regenerate their bodies, so Squidly would be the one who would most easily die.
  • When Sandy Goes out of her Treedome, she wears her air helmet. But the Dark Knight (Sandy's Ancestor) has no air helmet.
  • It didn't look like anything was restraining Spongebob when he was in the guillotine, so he could have easily got away.

APM Music Identification

  • Hawaiian Link (a) - The end of the Title Card.
  • Entry of the Heroes A - Spongebob and Patrick are ambushed by knights.
  • Dance Macabre -
  • Rescue - The dragon kidnaps Princess Pearl.
  • Dramatic Cue G - SpongeBob and the gang run upstairs to go rescue Pearl.
  • Dramatic Impact 2 -"You truly are the nastiest wizard in all Bikini Bottom Shire."

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