"Club SpongeBob" is a SpongeBob SquarePants episode from season 3. In this episode, SpongeBob, Patrick, and Squidward are flung into and stranded in the Kelp Forest, where the former two depend their lives on the Magic Conch shell.
- Squidward Tentacles
- SpongeBob SquarePants
- Patrick Star
- Magic Conch shell voice (debut)
- Ranger (single appearance)
The episode begins with Squidward leaving his house and riding his bicycle to work. He then rides past a tall tree, at the top of which is a tree house where SpongeBob and Patrick are sitting and giggling profusely. They see Squidward below and talk to each other about him, beginning certain words with "w." Squidward approaches the base of the tree and asks in perturbation if this manner of speaking is some kind of stupid code, and SpongeBob tells Squidward that he cannot tell him because he is not a member of their club. Squidward mocks them, saying that he is more than qualified to join their club. SpongeBob tells Squidward he could not fit in even if he tried. Squidward tells them that he is "a member of over 20 different exclusive clubs all across the sea bottom," but SpongeBob and Patrick continue to insist that he would not fit in. Enraged, Squidward tells them they know nothing of "fitting in" before he proceeds to climb the tree. SpongeBob and Patrick frantically tell Squidward to stop, but he does not.
Squidward crawls into their tree house, and SpongeBob and Patrick explain that they meant that he literally could not "fit in," and that they have been stuck up there for three days. SpongeBob and Patrick begin Squidward's initiation into their "club," but Squidward stops them, and attempts to get out by pulling on a smaller tree. He manages to make the tree double over and is about to crawl out when the second tree snaps, launching the tree house (with its three occupants) into the sky. They fly over the Kelp Forest, where a couple sees them, the man believing the tree house to be a shooting star.
The trio crash in a small clearing in a distant section of the kelp forest. SpongeBob and Patrick begin to jump and joyfully shout while Squidward panics at his situation of being lost and stuck with SpongeBob and Patrick. SpongeBob and Patrick try to comfort Squidward by telling him it could be worse, and that they will survive as a club and as long as they have the "Magic Conch Shell," a Magic 8 ball-like device which SpongeBob and Patrick treat as prophetic and all-knowing. They believe the Magic Conch should never be questioned and should always be consulted before any action is taken. SpongeBob asks it what they must do to escape the kelp forest, to which the conch says, "Nothing." SpongeBob and Patrick sit still on the ground doing nothing, and Squidward is enraged at their stupidity. He announces that he intends to escape the forest and get back to sanity by himself instead of taking advice from a stupid toy, and walks away. As Squidward tries to find an exit, he becomes lost and afraid and eventually comes back to where SpongeBob and Patrick are.
Even more time passes, and by now, Squidward has dismantled the box to build a shelter. He has a hat made out of some dried plant, has grown a five-o'clock shadow, and is sitting by a small campfire. A small bug scurries past, and Squidward catches it and proceeds to cook it. He taunts SpongeBob and Patrick with his "food," saying that they could have sided with him and survived, but instead listened to a talking shell. He proceeds to say while chuckling, "As if the answers to all your problems will fall right out of the sky!"
Above the forest, a damaged plane is serendipitously falling right out of the sky, and the pilots drop their load of picnic supplies and food to avoid crashing. The equipment lands around SpongeBob and Patrick, who emerge from their state of doing nothing to praise the magic conch. Squidward is extremely shocked, and he walks over to the two, who are devouring a table full of food. Squidward says he was only kidding earlier, and asks if he is still a member of the club, and SpongeBob tells him that he is still a member. Squidward cannot decide what to choose, and begrudgingly follows SpongeBob's suggestion of asking the conch shell. Squidward asks the conch permission to eat certain specific food items, which it denies. He repeatedly asks it permission to eat anything, which it denies every time. Squidward becomes enraged when the conch denies permission in a mocking tone, and is about to go insane when a Park Ranger enters the clearing.
Squidward tells him he has been stranded with SpongeBob, Patrick, and the magic conch shell for weeks, and his mention of the "magic conch shell" prompts the ranger to pull out an identical conch, revealing himself to also be cultishly obedient to the conch, much to Squidward's exasperated dismay. SpongeBob and Patrick are delighted to meet a "club member," and the ranger tells them that his conch advised him to look for them. The three club members praise the magic conch before asking it how to get out of the kelp forest. It again tells them, "Nothing." Following the conch's advice, they do nothing and assume sitting positions on the ground (until someone else comes and rescues them). Squidward, at the end of his sanity, praises the magic conch and sits down as well, as the episode ends.
- Every time Squidward asks the Magic Conch Shell for food, it keeps saying "No."
- Characters praising the Magic Conch and screeching in victory after something good happens.
|( ‣ ) Production music|
|( • ) Original music|
|( ◦ ) SpongeBob music|
‣ Grass Skirts Blowing (Hilo March) - The Hawaiian Serenaders [Title card]
‣ Me for You - George Callert [opening]
‣ Silly Season A - David Bell, Otto Sieben [Squidward refuses to join SpongeBob and Patrick's club]
‣ Danger Zone - Mike Sunderland [they get stranded in a forest]
‣ Tympup A - Sammy Burdson, John Charles Fiddy ["Well, this is the end."]
‣ Bashful Eyes - Kapono Beamer ["Come on, guys, we're gonna be fine."]
• Harp! - Nicolas Carr [magic conch shell]
‣ The Promised Land - David Farnon [conch tells them to do nothing]
‣ Comic Walk - Sidney Torch ["I can't believe you two are gonna take advice from a toy!"]
‣ On Fire - Gregor F. Narholz [Squidward gets lost]
‣ Heavenly Voices (B) - David Farnon [choir; Squidward sees a light]
‣ Newsreel - Sam Fonteyn ["Take that, SpongeBob and Patrick!"]
‣ Hawaiian Link (B) - Richard Myhill [Squidward realizes there is no way out]
‣ Hawaiian Breeze - Jon Jelmer [Squidward cooking a bug]
‣ Dramatic Cue (G) - Ronald Hanmer ["Dude, we're falling right out of the sky!"]
‣ Hawaiian Link (A) - Richard Myhill [bug hits Squidward]
‣ O Makalapua B - Kapono Beamer [SpongeBob and Patrick eating/"Yeah, now, uh, if you'll excuse me..."]
‣ The Oracle - David Farnon ["The conch is the one who gave us this banquet."]
• Steel Licks 1 - Jeremy Wakefield ["You guys have it all wrong."]
‣ Lonely Heart's Club A - David Bell, Otto Sieben [conch tells Squidward he cannot have anything to eat/"Could I have this yummy, delicious, super-terrific sandwich?"]
‣ Dramatic Cue (D) - Ronald Hanmer [Squidward getting angry]
‣ V for Victory - Sam Fonteyn [ranger appears]
‣ Grass Skirts Blowing (Hilo March) - The Hawaiian Serenaders [ending]
- This episode is available on the Nautical Nonsense and Sponge Buddies, Sponge Buddies, Absorbing Favorites, Complete 3rd Season, Sponge Crazy, Sponge in Service, First 100 Episodes, Really Big Box Set, The Ultimate SpongeBob Box Set, SpongeBob SquarePants Vol. 4, SpongeGuard on Duty (Russian), Complete Third Season, Orange Collection, From the Beginning, Part 1, The Seahorse, The SpongeBob SquarePants Collection, The SpongeBob SquarePants 8 Season DVD Collection, 2-Season TV Pack, The Third & Fourth Seasons, and The Best 200 Episodes Ever DVDs.
- This episode is available on the Sponge Buddies and Undersea Antics Volume 1 VHS tapes.
- This episode is also available on the It's a SpongeBob Christmas! Blu-ray.
- This episode and "Graveyard Shift" were the first to be released on home video before airing on American television. It was available on the Sponge Buddies VHS tape and the Nautical Nonsense and Sponge Buddies DVD, which were released on March 12, 2002, four months before this episode aired on American television.
- The title card background is similar to that of "Shanghaied," though it is gray instead of green.
- A painting of disheveled Squidward, as seen in the production art gallery, was initially going to be in the episode, but ultimately went unused.
- This was the last episode to credit Walt Dohrn as a writer for the show since he served as a storyboard director for "Party Pooper Pants" before his departure.
- Phrases that the Conch Shell says:
- "Maybe someday."
- "Nothing." (twice)
- "I don't think so."
- "No." (most commonly)
- "Try asking again."
- [in a mocking tone] "No."
- Squidward breaks the fourth wall when he says "Why must every 11 minutes of my life be filled with misery?" in reference an episode's average length.
- This is the second episode to reference the 11-minute runtime, the first being "Nature Pants."
- SpongeBob also breaks the fourth wall by saying "This copyrighted conch is the cornerstone of our organization" as a reference to the fact that the Magic Conch was copyrighted by Stephen Hillenburg.
- The episode is dubbed in Spanish and French on the North American release of the Absorbing Favorites and the Complete Third Season DVDs.
- This is the first episode to premiere during Friday Night Nicktoons.
- This is the second episode where Patrick uses his mouth like a vacuum cleaner to take in food. The first is "Grandma's Kisses."
- This is the fourth episode where the German dub version has the exact same title card as the English version. The first is "Plankton!," the second is "F.U.N.," and the third is "Texas."
- This is the only season 3 episode to date to have been released on a Blu-Ray disc.
- This is the only episode where the first half of "Grass Skirts Blowing (Hilo March)" is played in the title card. In other episodes that use it in the title card, there is an abridged version of the second half play. Also, the episode begins and ends with the song, somewhat bookending the episode.
- There is an online game based on this episode called Spitwad Showdown.
- In the Indonesian dub, at the beginning of the episode, every time Squidward says "stupid" and "moron" were all muted. This was most likely done due to both translations considered as profanity in Indonesia.
- In the Polish dub, the episode's title is "Klub SpongeBoba," which translates to "SpongeBob's Club."
- The victory screech from "The Algae's Always Greener" is used again.
- The Cephalopod Lodge is likely one of the more than 20 exclusive clubs Squidward claims to be a member of.
- The Magic Conch shell was made into a mobile app.
- SpongeBob and Patrick most likely kept their conch shell after this.
- This is the second episode with SpongeBob's name in it. The first was "Sandy, SpongeBob, and the Worm."
- The Magic Conch Shell is a parody of the real-world toy the Magic 8-Ball. It is used to answer yes/no questions, so it is peculiar that the Magic Conch Shell uses specific responses such as "nothing" and "neither."
- This episode also contains many references to the 1954 book Lord of the Flies by William Golding. The book is about a group of British schoolboys stranded on a deserted island after a plane crash, and their eventual descent into madness. One of the main symbols of the book is a conch shell, and whoever possesses the conch is able to have speaking power in discussions.
- At the beginning of the episode, the tree and the clubhouse are facing the road, and there are many trees seen. But after SpongeBob and Patrick insult Squidward, the tree and clubhouse are turned 90º to the right, and there are barely any trees shown. When Squidward climbs the tree, it is facing back to the road, but when he tries to get out of the clubhouse, it rotated 90º to the right again.
- Also, when Squidward tries to get out of the clubhouse, there is another skinny, tall tree that he grabs on. It does not appear in any scene before Squidward climbs into the clubhouse.
- When Squidward rides on his bike, he left his door open, but as soon as he tries to get back down, the door is shut.
- When the camera zooms in to the Magic Conch Shell during its last "no" in response to Squidward's last question, his arm is accidentally colored yellow, matching the color of SpongeBob.
- When Patrick pours ketchup into his mouth, his eyelids are white instead of purple. Also, when Patrick eats a bone, the bottom of his eyelids are pink instead of purple.
- In the same scene, three burgers appear on the table, and the sandwich disappears.
- When SpongeBob is shown drinking a glass of orange juice, the juice in the glass stays at the same level instead of going down.
- The clubhouse is facing to the left while it is in the air after the tree breaks at the time Squidward is about to get out of it, but it is facing to the right when it lands in the kelp forest, and to the left again when Squidward returns to SpongeBob and Patrick when he finds out that there is no way out of Kelp Forest.
- When the ranger arrives and shows his magic conch shell, SpongeBob and Patrick's conch disappears.
- During the opening credits, Erik Wiese's surname is misspelled as "Erik Weise."
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