This article is a transcript of the SpongeBob SquarePants episode "Bunny Hunt" from season 11, which aired on March 30, 2018.
- [The episode begins at Squidward's house where Squidward takes a really interesting meal he made out of the oven. He adds a bit of lemon juice on it and takes the meal to the table.]
- Squidward: [French accent] I am a culinary genius, no? [sets his meal on the table where a wooden mannequin is sitting] Here you are, sir. Ze specialty of mah house. Roast salad à la Squidward. [gasps] Sacré bleu! I must apologize, monsieur! I have forgotten the parsley for the garnish. [takes his meal back into the oven] Stay warm, my little Squidy. [kisses it, but it burns his lips; he shrieks] Le oww! [closes the oven and goes outside to his garden] Typical, I always forget something.
- [Squidward prepares to cut some of the parsley, but is pulled down by something.]
- Squidward: Ugh!
- [Squidward several attempts to pull the parsley out, but gets himself pulled into the ground. Underneath, he sees a sea bunny.]
- Squidward: A sea bunny? [pulls parsley back]
- [The sea bunny pulls Squidward's mustache off of his face.]
- Squidward: [shrieks sharply] Ow!
- [The sea bunny takes the mustache and ties it to his ukulele. He strums the ukulele and plays music while walking away in his tunnel.]
- Squidward: [pulls himself out of the ground, retrieves his chef's hat, and puts it back on] That voracious vermin is ruining my French chef fantasy. [stomps on the ground and prepares to walk back in the house] Why—ah! [falls in the hole the sea bunny came out from]
- [The sea bunny eats the parsley.]
- Squidward: Grr! [tries to grab the sea bunny, but it pulls his hat down over his head; Squidward tries to take it off, but the sea bunny tickles him] Oh—oh, no, no, no, no! I have a ticklish core! [laughs]
- [The sea bunny hops on top of Squidward and goes to ravage the garden. Suddenly, smoke comes out from the back door of his house.]
- Squidward: Oh. [sniffs and opens his eyes]
- [Squidward's house coughs up the smoke and fire breaks out. Squidward pulls himself out of the ground, grabs the hose, and rushes back in the house.]
- Squidward: My roast à la Squidward!
- [Squidward puts out the fire and carries his meal out. His roast à la Squidward is now burnt to a crisp and Squidward sighs. He sobs over his ruined creation. The sea bunny pops out of the hole and cries with Squidward.]
- Squidward: What the—[growls as he goes to kill the sea bunny]
- [The sea bunny grabs the burnt roast à la Squidward and shoves it in Squidward's mouth.]
- Squidward: Oof! [gulps the burnt roast à la Squidward down and starts to feel sick]
- [Squidward runs back in and the sea bunny hops back in his hole. The sea bunny continues to eat Squidward's vegetable garden as he dances to the music "The Blue Danube." He continues to enjoy himself until Squidward comes out, wearing a Viking outfit and holding a club.]
- Squidward: I declare war on bunnies!
- [Squidward runs to his garden and tries to strike the sea bunny with his club, but he ends up destroying his vegetables in the process. The sea bunny holds out a shield and protects himself from Squidward's club. The impact of the shield and the club causes it to get stuck on Squidward's face. Squidward pulls the club off his face and groans at his destroyed garden.]
- Squidward: [growls and screams] I am going to bury that bunny! [falls in the hole again]
- [The sea bunny giggles and belches. He buries Squidward in the soil and waters him with a watering can before walking away. Squidward then grows into a plant. Moments later, Patrick walks by and sees Squidward as a plant.]
- Patrick: [gasps, climbs over the fence, and walks over towards Squidward] Wow. That's the ugliest eggplant I've ever seen! I don't think Squidward would mind if I took a little taste. Ooh, come here.
- [Patrick grabs Squidward with his teeth and attempts to pull him off the stem. However, Squidward is completely stuck onto the stem, which causes Patrick to lose his grip and sends him falling into back under his rock. The scene changes to the sea bunny gathering more vegetables in Squidward's garden. He pulls out several vegetables and puts them in the basket. Suddenly, a really big carrot grows out of the ground. The sea bunny's buckteeth grow longer and sniffs it. The giant carrot, who is actually Squidward in disguise, pops out of the soil and runs away. The sea bunny begins to follow Squidward.]
- Squidward: Ha, he's gonna fall right into my trap. [laughs]
- [Squidward trips over a rock and gets caught in his own trap. The sea bunny begins knowing on Squidward's carrot costume.]
- Squidward: [on the phone] Hello, Animal Control? I've got a sea bunny cornered in my garden and need assistance!
- [The animal control officer pulls over with Patrick locked in the back. He exits the truck, grabs the sea bunny and puts him in a cage.]
- Squidward: Did you have to catch him that easily?
- SpongeBob: [handcuffs himself on the sea bunny's cage] I demand the release of this poor woodland creature. He's got rights too, you know.
- Squidward: This is none of your business, SpongeBob, go away!
- Animal Control Officer: You want him? You can keep him. [gives SpongeBob the cage] Save me a trip to the incinerator.
- SpongeBob: Hooray! [giggles]
- [SpongeBob pops out two rainbows and clouds from his head. The clouds fly under SpongeBob and form the word, "Happy!" SpongeBob floats away from Squidward's garden and flies into his house.]
- Squidward: I'm warning you, SpongeBob. Keep that filthy animal away from my—[gets slammed in the face when SpongeBob kicks the front door closed]
- SpongeBob: [opens the fridge and talks in sing-song] Vegetables! That's what you like, isn't it, bunny? We'll see what we got in the fridge.
- [The sea bunny climbs out of the cage, sniff, and pants.]
- SpongeBob: Whoops, I'm out of veggies. But I got something even better. [holds up Gary's food bowl] Gary's food! Yay! [the sea bunny sees how disgusting Gary's food is: a female shriek is heard off screen in horror of the food] Does bunny wunny like his dinny winny?
- [The sea bunny throws the food bowl in SpongeBob's face. The bowl falls off and SpongeBob wipes the food off.]
- SpongeBob: All right, Gary's food is out. Got it. I'll get you veggies. I'll be right back.
- [SpongeBob forms himself into a egg-shaped rocket and blasts off out of his house. He flies over to the Barg'N-Mart to get vegetables. The sea bunny's stomach growls and begins looking around for food. He bites on the table and spits it out, breaking a flower pot in the process. He rips a hole on SpongeBob's chair and hops around, knocking over the shellphone. He opens the television screen, grabs some wires, and bites on them, electrocuting himself by accident. SpongeBob returns from the Barg'N-Mart with a bag of vegetables.]
- SpongeBob: [sing-song] Bunny wunny! I've got a surprise for you—[screams when he sees the mess the sea bunny made]
- [SpongeBob's teeth scream as well. The living room is a complete mess and the wires from the walls are sparking. The sea bunny goes into the bag and begins eating the vegetables.]
- SpongeBob: I'm gonna have to chew-proof this whole house fast! [pulls out a bottle of hot sauce] Hot sauce ought to do the trick.
- [SpongeBob squirts hot sauce on the couch and the shattered flower pot. The sea bunny sniffs the hot sauce and licks some. He belches out fire from his mouth and burns the flower pot. He giggles at this and hops for a bit. He goes to lick the hot sauce from the deflated chair. He belches fire at SpongeBob's employee of the month photo and it burns. He goes to lick the hot sauce of SpongeBob's ribbons, trophy, books, and piggy bank as well as Gary's baby picture and toy ball. He belches fire on SpongeBob's stuff and burns everything. SpongeBob squirts hot sauce on Gary's shell and sees his living room on fire.]
- SpongeBob: Huh? No, no, no, no!
- [Thinking fast, SpongeBob takes a fire extinguisher and plugs it in his head. He absorbs the liquid from the extinguisher and spews it out all over the place to put out the fire. The sea bunny grabs the hot sauce bottle and drinks what's left of it. Suddenly, something bubbles in him and Gary backs away in panic. The sea bunny's face turns red and belches out a huge stream of fire.]
- SpongeBob: My comic books!
- [SpongeBob sprays water with the water gun to protect his Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy comic book collection from the fire. The sea bunny's mouth gets filled with water and he is cooled down.]
- SpongeBob: I gotta get rid of all that hot sauce.
- [SpongeBob licks up all of the hot sauce until everything is clean.]
- SpongeBob: [turns red hot and screams as his tongue erupts like a volcano] Oh, oh, oh, oh! [dunks in the toilet and cools himself off]
- [Bubble transition to SpongeBob setting up a cage for the sea bunny to live in.]
- SpongeBob: Here we are! Water supply—check. Trampoline for hopping—check. Buckteeth sharpener—check. And an adding machine for multiplying. [giggles] Triple check-aroonie! Now the bunny will be more than happy to stay in his cage. Huh? [pushes the cage to the sea bunny]
- [The sea bunny sniffs the cage. He is not happy at the cage and shrieks. He kicks the cage at SpongeBob and pants wildly.]
- SpongeBob: Doesn't like cage... [falls into pieces] Check.
- [The sea bunny pants and growls. He climbs on the wall, rips a hole and crawls underneath the wallpaper.]
- SpongeBob: No, no, bunny, don't go in there! You'll get lost! I need my jellyfishing net. Where did I put that thing? [runs to the sofa and digs his hand in the cushion] Probably dropped it in here somewhere. Nyah, nyah—ah, got it! [pulls out Patrick with the jellyfishing net on his head]
- Patrick: Hello!
- SpongeBob: Patrick, did you fall between the cushions again?
- Patrick: No, SpongeBob, I fell between the cushions. [takes off the net] But I have a solution to your bunny problem. I love the hunt!
- [Patrick rips a hole on the wall and crawls underneath the wallpaper to go after the sea bunny. But no matter where he goes, he knocks down everything off the wall.]
- SpongeBob: [screams in panic as things drop off the wall] No, no! No, don't! Please don't! That's my—[part of the ceiling as well as the ceiling fan falls down] All right, Patrick, that's enough hunting. You can come out now.
- Patrick: I can't see where I'm going. How do I get out of here? [screams in panic as he crawls to another wall] SpongeBob, where are I? [gets absorbed by the wallpaper]
- SpongeBob: Stay where you are, Patrick! I've got an idea. To the pet shop!
- [The screen changes into a map where SpongeBob, in video game character form, goes to the pet store to buys something.]
- SpongeBob: Thank you! [goes back to his house with another sea bunny in a cage] Patrick! I bought a second bunny to lure the first bunny out of hiding.
- Patrick: Hooray!
- [SpongeBob gets up, opens the cage, and lets out a female sea bunny with a pink bow on it. The sea bunny notices the female, crawls to the ground and pops out from the floor. He investigates her and see becomes heads over heels with him. They two sea bunnies dance to a tango and SpongeBob plays music with the accordion. Patrick reappears from the wall.]
- SpongeBob: Hold still, Patrick, I see you. [rips a hole to free Patrick]
- Patrick: [gasps for air and sighs] Thanks, buddy. [the two sea bunnies hop by] Aww, bunnies!
- [SpongeBob laughs as he follows the sea bunnies. Patrick comes out from the wall and follows as well. The two sea bunnies go into the bathroom and hop into the laundry basket. When SpongeBob and Patrick enter the bathroom, the two sea bunnies hop out of the basket.]
- SpongeBob: One, two...[another sea bunny comes out] Three?
- [It turns out the two sea bunnies multiplied in the laundry basket and a whole bunch of sea bunnies hop out.]
- Patrick: More bunnies!
- SpongeBob: [nervous laugh] Yay!
- [The sea bunnies climb into the hole on the wall and crawl under the wallpaper.]
- SpongeBob: Uh-oh. [he and Patrick grab jellyfishing nets] Patrick, the hunt is on! [he and Patrick do their war cry]
- [SpongeBob and Patrick climb into the hole on the wall and crawl under the wallpaper as well. They chase after the sea bunnies from the bathroom, to the living downstairs, and then out the front door.]
- SpongeBob: Hey! Come back, bunny wunnies!
- [SpongeBob and Patrick chase after the sea bunnies all the way to Squidward's house. Squidward appears in a funeral attire and pays his final respects to his vegetable garden.]
- Squidward: [French accent] This is the last carrot. [places the carrot next to the gravestone] C'est la vie. [the sea bunny pops out from the ground] One more step, and I will spit you on a roast! I mean, roast you on a spit! [the ground underneath rumbles and more sea bunnies appear] Oh, oh, what's happening?
- [SpongeBob and Patrick appear from the ground.]
- SpongeBob: Don't worry, Squidward.
- Patrick: Yeah. We're here to help!
- Squidward: They're growing! [shrieks and runs into his house]
- [The sea bunnies crawl into Squidward's house. Squidward zips the door shut as sea bunnies crawl under the wallpaper. Squidward hides under the table and dials the shellphone.]
- Squidward: Hello, Animal Control? Save me!
- [The sea bunnies emerge from the wallpaper and from one of Squidward's paintings. More sea bunnies emerge from the cabinets while others emerge from the electric outlet. Squidward blubbers in panic as sea bunnies invade his house. One sea bunny emerges from his nose. His entire house is flooded with sea bunnies. Squidward escapes from the upper window of his house. He gets up and groans like an old man. He shakes the sea bunnies off him and growls in anger. He grabs a mallet from the shed and spits on his hand.]
- Squidward: Get out of my house! Gah! [hits his house with the mallet] That'll get them out.
- [Squidward's house cracks and breaks into two halves. The sea bunnies form into his own house from underneath the wallpaper, much to Squidward's horror.]
- SpongeBob: Sorry about your house, Squidward.
- Patrick: Yeah. We just heard.
- [Squidward is overwhelmed with what he did and whacked himself on the head with the mallet. His head opens and his brain flies out. Squidward goes mentally insane and grows bunny ears, whiskers, a pair of buckteeth, and a fluffy tail. He then begins to hop like a sea bunny.]
- Squidward: [maniacal laugh] I'm a bunny now! [crazy laugh] I'm a bunny now! I'm a bunny now!
- Animal Control Officer: Okay, Mr. Tentacles, easy does it. [puts a straitjacket on Squidward]
- [Squidward kicks the animal control officer in the face and runs away. The animal control officer gets up and goes after the mentally-crazed Squidward with the net.]
- Squidward: [maniacal laugh] I'm a bunny now! [crazy laugh] I'm a bunny now!
- [As the animal control officer chase after the crazy squid into the sunset, one sea bunny makes a face to look like Squidward. He mumbles like Squidward and plays "Shave and a Haircut" on the clarinet before closing the sea bunny window, ending the episode.]