Encyclopedia SpongeBobia

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Encyclopedia SpongeBobia
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Encyclopedia SpongeBobia

This article is a transcript of the SpongeBob SquarePants episode "Atlantis SquarePantis" from season 5, which aired on November 12, 2007.

  • [We see a live traffic jam on a busy expressway. Patchy is in one of the cars in it. He is also wearing sunglasses.]
  • Patchy: Let's go! [honks his horn] Hey, kids. Rush hour traffic here in Encino is a real bringdown. [grumbles in frustration] A little music should soothe me jangled nerves. At least my in-dash hi-fi still works. [Patchy puts a cassette tape in the radio, which breaks and the music stops. Patchy shows the broken cassette tape.] Oh! Me ultra-rare "Frampton Comes Alive" 8-track destroyed! [Tosses it into the car] And I'm gonna miss the new SpongeBob cartoon if this traffic doesn't move soon! [Patchy growls and cries while he moans. Patchy's cell phone rings. The ringtone is SpongeBob's piccolo from the theme song] Who's calling? [answers the phone] Yes, Patchy here. Start squawkin'.
  • Potty: [squawks] Hey, Patchy, the new SpongeBob cartoon's about to start. Where are you, brawk?
  • Patchy: Stuck on the 101. Be a dear and record it for me, would you?
  • Potty: Oh, I threw out that old Betamax machine in the garbage. [squawks]
  • Patchy: You what?!
  • Potty: Oh, calm down, beardy.
  • Patchy: Potty, you know how important this cartoon is to me! [Someone honks his horn at Patchy] Do you mind?! I'm trying to talk to my parrot! [The man looks at Patchy in shock as Patchy gets back on his phone to talk to Potty] Sorry, Potty. Just some landlubber. [Potty hangs up] Potty? Hello, hello, hello, hello?! [looks at his phone's screen. It says "call dropped" with a Jolly Roger symbol. Patchy groans] Dropped again. [Patchy closes his phone] Curse this traffic! [the traffic starts moving again] Ooh! [Patchy pulls up his anchor, much to the man's confusion. Patchy drives into a desert-like area] Arrgh! Home at last! What the...? [his eyes pop out from behind his pair of sunglasses, breaking them] Encino... it's gone. No...! [Patchy cries] You know, kids, this kinda reminds Patchy of an old story. Another story of a... lost city. Why don't you check it out? Oh, Encino. [he continues sobbing, and the episode starts. SpongeBob and Patrick are blowing bubbles]
  • Patrick: A beautiful specimen, SpongeBob.
  • SpongeBob: Hurry, Patrick, hurry! [Patrick takes a photo of the bubble and it pops] How's it look, buddy? Ready for the old scrapbook?
  • Patrick: More like the scrap-heap. [throws the photo into a big pile] They never come out right! Oh, well, let's try again.
  • SpongeBob: Okay, Patrick, this one's gonna be a masterpiece.
  • Patrick: I'm ready. [SpongeBob blows a bubble in his image]
  • SpongeBob Bubble: Hi, Patrick!
  • Patrick: [takes a photo of the bubble but when he does, it pops] I missed it again! This darn camera isn't fast enough! [stomps on the camera]
  • SpongeBob: Hold on a second, Patrick! It's not the poor camera's fault you can't get a photo.
  • Patrick: It's not?
  • SpongeBob: No, it is the very nature of the fragile bubble.
  • Patrick: It is?
  • SpongeBob: Yes, it is, my friend. Allow me to demonstrate. [blows a bubble in the shape of a microphone and starts singing] ♪ The sun must set at the end of every day. ♪ [the sun sets and pops] ♪ And the curtain must fall at the end of every play. ♪ [a curtain made of bubble soap drops down behind Patrick and pops. SpongeBob floats up on a bubble. He is surrounded by lots of other bubbles] ♪ And every little bubble ever blown must someday pop. ♪ [all of the bubbles pop. SpongeBob falls]
  • Patrick: ♪ Like presents on Christmas Day, it doesn't seem to stay. Or a cheese soufflé, it doesn't last all day. ♪
  • SpongeBob: ♪ I will try again... ♪
  • Backup Singers: ♪ Try again... ♪
  • SpongeBob: ♪ ...To blow a bubble... ♪
  • Backup Singers: ♪ To blow a bubble... ♪
  • SpongeBob: ♪ ...That will last all day. ♪
  • Backup Singers: ♪ To blow a bubble that will last...♪
  • Patrick: ♪ ...All day. ♪ [SpongeBob begins to blow a giant bubble. The bubble captures them both and floats away] Um, SpongeBob?
  • SpongeBob: Not now, Patrick. This bubble's gonna break all records!
  • Patrick: I hope it doesn't break until we get a little closer to the ground.
  • SpongeBob: Huh? [gasps] What have I done?! [The two start crying for help as the bubble drifts into a cave] We're never gonna get out of here!
  • Patrick: No! [the bubble is popped by a jagged point of half a broken amulet] What happened?
  • SpongeBob: [pointing to broken amulet] That's what happened.
  • Patrick: Whoa, what is it? It looks really old.
  • SpongeBob: Antis, what do think that means, Patrick?
  • Patrick: Antis, Antis...SquarePantis! Probably belonged to your ancient ancestors. [Picks up the half of the amulet] SpongeBob SquarePantis, you must wear the ancient crest of your ancestors, for it is your birthright! [shoves it into SpongeBob's face]
  • SpongeBob: [Falling] My birthright?! Ow, ooh, ow, ooh, ow! Let's take this to the Bikini Bottom museum, they'll know what it is!
  • [cut to museum]
  • Mr. Krabs: [Whistles] Oo... uh... beautiful day for standing outside a museum doin' nothin'.
  • Security Guard: Whatever you say.
  • Mr. Krabs: [pretends to be administration] Hello there. Welcome to the museum! That'll be three dollars.
  • Old Lady: But I thought it was free Tuesday.
  • Mr. Krabs: No, no, no. Today's Monday. Otherwise I wouldn't be wearing this "I hate Mondays" shirt.
  • Old Lady: Good point.
  • Mr. Krabs: Enjoy the artifacts! [mutters under breath] Don't stand in one place too long, people might mistake you for one. [Hears SpongeBob laughing] SpongeBob! [hides, then re-emerges when SpongeBob and Patrick go into the museum] Hew, that was a close one. [old lady points him out to a police officer then Mr. Krabs runs inside]
  • Squidward: Neptune's ascension. The only surviving painting from the great lost city of Atlantis. This is just what the doctor ordered, Squiddy. Spending your day studying the Atlantean masters. And best of all, no Sponge... [SpongeBob and Patrick run in excitedly, knocking Squidward over] Oh, would you two watch were you're-- [gasps] What is that? What are you doing with the amulet of Atlantis?
  • SpongeBob: We were just...
  • Squidward: You're going to steal it?!
  • SpongeBob: No. Squidward, we'd never...
  • Squidward: This is a new low, even for you two. Lucky for you, I was here today. Stealing artifacts could land you in the stony loneso... [Sees the amulet's half was still there and is dumbfounded]...oome?! You boobs found the missing half of the Atlantean amulet?
  • SpongeBob: What's an Atlantean omelet?
  • Squidward: Amulet, not omelet! It's the key to untold riches!
  • [Mr. Krabs shoves SpongeBob and Patrick over violently and faces Squidward.]
  • Mr. Krabs: Did somebody say untold riches?
  • Squidward: Yes, Eugene. The streets are lined with gold, and the street lamps are made with diamonds.
  • Mr. Krabs: Diamond light bulbs! I wonder what they make the money out of.
  • Squidward: For reasons unknown, this great city disappeared one day, but no ruins were ever found. All the inventions that you take for granted, were given to us by the Atlanteans. Their advances in art, financial wealth and weaponry were eons ahead of their time!
  • SpongeBob: Why is this bubble painted on the mural?
  • Squidward: That's just the oldest living bubble.
  • SpongeBob: The oldest living bubble alive? [shoves Patrick in front of it] Behold, Patrick! The oldest living bubble!
  • Patrick: This is the most beautiful bubble I've ever seen.
  • Squidward: That's just a painting, you quarter-wit! [to Mr. Krabs] Quarter-wit. Ha, it's less than half. The real bubble lives in Atlantis, some dumb old bubble pales in comparison to the arts...
  • Mr. Krabs: Money!
  • Sandy: [comes onto the screen from out of nowhere] And science! Don't forget science! What's all the hubbub, boys?
  • Squidward: These two chowder-brains found the missing half of the amulet.
  • Sandy: The Amulet of Atlantis?! Legend says, that when the two halves are joined, the path to Atlantis is opened! What are y'all waitin' on? Let's hitch them two doggies up! Go on, Squidward!
  • Mr. Krabs: Hurry up, Squidward, that money ain't gettin' any younger! [Squidward connects the two halves and a bright light activates. Squidward is happy. Sandy is in disbelief. SpongeBob and Patrick exclaim excitedly.]
  • Patrick: [laughing]
  • SpongeBob: Hoo hoo, yeah, hoo hoo hoo!
  • [A bus drops from the ceiling]
  • Squidward: The magical path to Atlantis is a van?
  • Mr. Krabs: Nice hot rod flames!
  • Patrick: [Coin spins and attaches itself to the bus] What's it doing? [The door to the van opens. We fade to black, then to the bus opening again. Sandy looks inside]
  • Sandy: Well, holly-wally ding-dang-doo! Would ya look at that? Take a gander, y'all!
  • Squidward: Fabulous decor!
  • Mr. Krabs: Quite a vessel, but who's manning it?
  • Robot: Greetings. Welcome aboard the Sea Ship Atlantis. This is a nonstop trip, so please take a seat, relax, and we'll be on our way.
  • Mr. Krabs: Bet there's some loose change in here!
  • SpongeBob: Ah, so this is what luxury feels like.
  • Squidward: Ah, what I wouldn't give for a foot-rub.
  • Robot: Attention, passengers. Regretfully, we lack the fuel needed for forward motion.
  • All: What?!
  • [later, we see them all pushing the bus to the gas station. Mr. Krabs takes the hose and tries to fill up the bus with gas, but can't find the gas tank]
  • Mr. Krabs: Is this some kind of joke? Where's the gas tank?
  • Robot: We Atlanteans find the use of fossil fuels to be counter-intuitive, and have developed an alternative source we call song.
  • Mr. Krabs: Huh?
  • Robot: The engine of this vessel is fueled by song. The more you sing of your desires, the closer to Atlantis you will get. Let us commence singing.
  • Squidward: Does that make any sense?
  • SpongeBob: No, but I'm game for singing any day! ♪Sing? Sing a song? A song of wanting to move along!♪ [the van rises up and floats in mid-air. SpongeBob sings off-key] ♪To a land where all our dre-e.♪ [the van crashes back down] Whoops, sorry. ♪To a land where all our dreeeeeams, can finally come true.♪ [the van rises up high. It makes a hole in the roof] ♪A bubble I long for, that so eludes me, but soon enough I will see...♪
  • Mr. Krabs: ♪Well, that's just splendid, boy! A land where it rains money! More than you can spend. With fives and tens and fifties and I'll want to be your friend.♪
  • Plankton: ♪Ha, ha, ha. Such a valiant desire, he, he, he. The lost weapons of Atlantis - the most advanced of all time. As soon as this dopey song is done, I plan to make them mine...!♪
  • Sandy: ♪Did you all hear something? I can hardly believe that there's a lost city where having smarts is more important than being pretty!♪ [Sandy pours green slime on herself, and makes a clone of herself, and divides herself into two] ♪With all their advanced science, and my painfully large mind!♪
  • Sandy Clone: ♪I bet we can figure out how to make wondrous things, like melons with edible rinds!♪ [they dig in on the watermelon. Juice gets on the screen and transitions to Squidward playing piano]
  • Squidward: ♪As a connoisseur of fine art, I'm proud to say! I've always seen things in my own special way! 'Art'-lantis, with their glorious aesthetics, I'll copy their style in a while, my art will be prophetic!♪
  • Patrick: ♪I'm Patrick, I'm Patrick, Patrick-Patrick-Patrick! And I like, um, uh,..♪ [record scratches] I don't know what I like.
  • Robot: Warning, you have run out of song fuel.
  • All: [Everyone huddles together and screams until Squidward looks out the window]
  • Squidward: Hey, look, it's Atlantis!
  • SpongeBob: Pretty!
  • All: [They continue to scream and the bus smashes through a city wall of Atlantis. We see that it has futuristic blue and purple buildings with spires and bubbles. The bus suddenly skids to a stop, unearthing some trees in the process. The five emerge from the bus.]
  • Squidward: You dimwits haven't even been here two minutes and you've already messed up someone's topiary garden.
  • Mr. Krabs: Go on, SpongeBob. Ring the bell.
  • SpongeBob: Ring for the king, huh? [rings the bell. A red carpet comes down the stairs and Lord Royal Highness comes out]
  • Lord Royal Highness: Welcome to Atlantis. I've been expecting you. [Falls down the stairs] Allow me to introduce myself. I am the Lord Royal Highness, but my friends call me LRH.
  • SpongeBob: My friends call me SpongeBob. I'm here to see the oldest living bubble.
  • LRH: Yes, of course.
  • Mr. Krabs: What a ripoff! This street ain't gold!
  • LRH: Oh, if it's gold you want, you'll find it in our vault.
  • Mr. Krabs: I'm Eugene. I like money.
  • LRH: Yes, I can see that. Pleasure to meet you. Come, I'll give you the grand tour of our Atlantean fortress. I'm so glad you're all here.
  • Plankton: They're gone. Now to get to those weapons... [tries to open the glovebox door, but fails] Trapped! Okay, what do I have to work with here? What's this? Owners manual!? Looks like I found my escape route! [Laughs diabolically] Ow!
  • LRH: For centuries, we Atlanteans spent, nay, wasted our talents and energy building the most sophisticated weaponry to defend ourselves from invaders. But we abandoned the idea of warfare long ago and now all these weapons gather dust behind this locked door as an example of what must be done if one wishes to live in harmony with all creatures of this, or any, world.
  • Mr. Krabs: [sighs] Eh, harmony, schmarmony. When do we get to see the treasure?!
  • LRH: But of course, follow me.
  • Mr. Krabs: Comin' through, boys!
  • Plankton: These Atlanteans leave a room full of the most advanced weaponry unguarded? No wonder they got lost. [Squeezes under door] Oh, my! There will be no one to stop me this time! [Laughs diabolically. Patchy reappears, he is still in a desert area, he looks around, but Encino's missing, and his sunglasses still broke]
  • Patchy: Well, bad news, kids. Encino's still lost. [The radio starts playing] Oh! But, at least I got me radio fixed! [Patchy snaps his fingers while listening to it, then it explodes] Well, enjoy the rest of the show. [cuts back to Atlantis and then cuts to LRH giving the tour]
  • LRH: It is both an honor and a pleasure to welcome you to Atlantis. We haven't had visitors in some time. You see, being in a lost city has certain disadvantages which I digress. Now if you follow me, I'll show you some of our grandest achievements...
  • Mr. Krabs: Squidward! You told me the streets were paved with gold. Now that street light better be a 600 karat diamond or else. [Mr. Krabs gets on Squidward's neck and starts unscrewing a lightbulb] Ah, hold still, Squidward.
  • Squidward: You're standing on my neck!
  • [They trip and the light bulb smashes.]
  • LRH: Are you all right?
  • Mr. Krabs: Yeah, but I feel odd.
  • [Mr. Krabs starts acting strange]
  • SpongeBob: Mr. Krabs? You okay?
  • [Mr. Krabs sniffs]
  • Mr. Krabs: I'd know that smell anywhere. [Pockets have mouths and start barking like dogs] Me pockets! They be smellin' loot! Whoa, whoa, whoa!
  • [His pockets drag him into the hall of Treasure and start taking the treasure]
  • LRH: Those pockets of yours certainly have a nose for treasure.
  • Mr. Krabs: These are me houndstooth pants.
  • LRH: What you see here is a glimpse of ancient Atlantean history. Long ago we abandoned our obsession with wealth to focus on the pursuit of knowledge. So help yourselves to as much as you pockets can carry!
  • Mr. Krabs: As much as me pockets can carry?! ♪Oh, if I'd only known when I woke up today, I'd have stopped at me tailors along the way, and had ten more pockets put on me pants, 'cause I think I hear a money avalanche!♪ [yodeling] ♪Look at all this cash, hey, look at all this money! I hope me heart can take it!♪ [goes unconscious]
  • Medic Fish: Clear! [shocks Krabs]
  • Mr. Krabs: ♪I'm alright, sonny! Industrial accidents can make quite a mess. Unless you fall into a money press. Oh, make me into money, Mr. wonderful machine, I always knew that me true color was green! Oh, ever since I was a little kid, I dreamed of such a place, yes I did! With mountains of money, and rivers of cash. And a pool of coins to make a splash! Oh, I'll open up a Krusty Krab with patties made of money. They'd be delicious, and expensive, and taste like golden honey! Money and gold and treasure untold! And all of it for me!♪
  • LRH: Mr. Krabs, we're off to see the bubble, would you care to join us?
  • Mr. Krabs: Are you kiddin'?! I just got here!
  • LRH: Very well then. Off we go.
  • Patrick: SpongeBob, when are we gonna see the bubble?
  • SpongeBob: Patrick, shh!
  • LRH: Don't dally, lads. You don't wanna be left behind do you?
  • SpongeBob: No, sir. Come on along, Patrick.
  • Sandy: You know, LRH, I was born with a scientific curiosity and I was wonderin' if I could get a peek at some of your scientific achievements?
  • LRH: Of course, Miss Cheeks, here we are, the combination of all our technology. I give you the Atlantean Hall of Science.
  • [Opens a large door]
  • Sandy: Hoppin' acorns! Look at all this high-tech gear! [Looks at an invention] What does this gizmo do?
  • LRH: It's a biomass converting device. It can take any household object-- this comb, for example-- and turn it into say, ice cream. Would anyone like to try?
  • Both: Oh, me, me, me, me, me, me!
  • LRH: Go ahead!
  • Both: Yay!
  • [The boys eat the ice cream.]
  • SpongeBob: Comb flavored.
  • Sandy: What else can it turn things into?
  • LRH: Actually it can only turn things into ice cream. We haven't worked out that bug yet but I can show you the most amazing/fantastic device created by Atlantean hands. Behold, this grand machine allows the user to be broken down to nano-stature, enabling them to battle germs hand to hand.
  • Sandy: How's it work?
  • LRH: Please have a seat and I'll explain. Now, here’s how it works…
  • SpongeBob: Hey, cool.
  • [SpongeBob disappears]
  • Patrick: Where'd SpongeBob go?
  • LRH: Right now, his molecules are being broken down into data which is assembled in this computer and is stored on these tapes, then re-assembled on a much smaller scale...
  • SpongeBob: Someone help me!
  • LRH: And finally passes through this tube and into this tank which contains every element known to... [peers closer] Oh, dear heavens! It looks like our scientists were working on a very aggressive case of the sniffles! He could be in trouble.
  • Patrick: Don't worry, SpongeBob. I'm comin' to help you!
  • [Patrick disappears]
  • Squidward: Okay, I've seen enough. Let me out of this thing! [Squidward disappears and reappears into an 8-bit scene] What's going on here? I... Oh no. [screams]
  • [Squidward sees a giant nose]
  • SpongeBob: Squidward, don't make any sudden movements!
  • [The nose sneezes germs and Squidward falls over, jumps quickly, and runs.]
  • Squidward: Help! [Screams]
  • [SpongeBob and Patrick follow while they're being chased by germs, and Sandy enters the game]
  • All: Help, Sandy!
  • Sandy: Sounds like them critters is in trouble! [The nose catches SpongeBob, Patrick and Squidward, and the germs block Sandy from getting to them] Hold on, fellas! I'll be there soon, as soon as I send these critters to their doom! [A title screen shows like a Nintendo game] ♪Look out, germs. The end is near, Your days are numbered, 'cause Sandy's here! I'll get these germs, and make 'em pay, with some good old-fashioned karate.♪ Hi-yah! ♪If I borrow some elements from the periodic table, I can mix up a brew that is sure to disable any virus, bug, or sniffle that steps into my path. And make them feel my microscopic wrath!♪ Hi-yah! [she hits the nose with a submarine and defeats it, the rest of the gang gets saved, they all cheer, then the game says: "Game Over." Everyone is out of the machine]
  • LRH: Well, shall we continue on with the rest of the tour?
  • Sandy: Y'all head out without me.
  • [Sandy goes back in the machine again]
  • LRH: Well then, good luck. Have fun. We'll see you at dinner. [To SpongeBob] Your friend Sandy certainly is an excitable one.
  • SpongeBob: Quite.
  • Squidward: Somehow I knew I'd get stuck with you yahoos the longest.
  • [The camera zooms in to the heater vent where Plankton is hiding, Plankton chuckles]
  • Plankton: ♪Oh, what a beautiful sight! Weapons as far as the eye can see. But which one will be right for me? How do I pick? Which one will do the trick? Which is best to guarantee eternal rest? So many weapons! How do I choose? Look at this one with a beautiful fuse! And with this one I couldn't lose. That one will surely give them the blues... And this one here matches my shoes!♪ [serious tone] Come on, Plankton, just pick one and forget about your shoes! Eeny, meeny, minie moe, I pick you, now let's go! [jumps into a giant tank's gun. Scene cuts to LRH giving the tour]
  • Squidward: This stuff is wonderful and all but when are we gonna see some real Atlantean culture?
  • LRH: Gentlemen, What is art?
  • SpongeBob: Oh, oh, I know, I know!
  • [Squidward shoves SpongeBob]
  • Squidward: I thought you'd never ask! Art is the conscious arrangement of elements in a manner that affects a sense of beauty.
  • LRH: Not even close! [Squidward looks shocked] Art is what happens when you learn to dream. [Gives SpongeBob a blue paint brush] Go ahead. Dream a little.
  • [SpongeBob touches the wall with the brush and the paint creates SpongeBob's house door]
  • SpongeBob: It looks like my front door!
  • LRH: Behold! The Hall of Arts!
  • [He opens the door, they step in, and Squidward's mouth opens]
  • Squidward: Incredible! [cries] The creativity! The artistry! [Walks in front of a painting] This painting is so realistic! It looks like you could step straight into it.
  • LRH: And you can!
  • [Throws Squidward into the painting]
  • SpongeBob: Whoa!
  • Squidward: This place is amazing! [steps into other paintings] ♪Isn't this great, isn't this neat, I'm a living work of art from my head to my feet! From the very first drawings on walls in caves, art has been what the heart and soul craves! So pick up a brush, a pencil or pen. If you don't like this one, paint it again! From now on please call me Sir Real. I can wait for your impression to congeal. Take it from an undersea renaissance man. I'd even look great on the side of your van! Any way you carve it, I am art and art is me. Ask your mama or your dada to tell you about the uh, schism. Between minimalism and cubism. My personality may be of the cynical type. But I've finally found something that lives up to the hype. I can say honestly and with great certainty, that Atlantis is where I want to spend eternity!♪ [holds note. Scene cuts when Squidward's out of the painting]
  • Atlantean: Hey, can you not sing? I'm trying to model here.
  • Atlantean Painter: Now hold on Nando. Why don't you take five. I'm really diggin' this squid's form.
  • [The other Atlantean sighs and walks away]
  • Squidward: Looks like I'll be here inspiring these Atlantean art makers with my beauty. You guys go on ahead!
  • SpongeBob: Okay. Bye, Squidward!
  • [They leave and Squidward poses]
  • LRH: Now this section of town is known for its advances in the science of fondue cooking.
  • SpongeBob: Excuse me, sir, this tour has been great and all, but uh, can we see the bubble now?
  • LRH: Do excuse me. Most folks don't stay with the tour this long. Of course you can. But first, remember this. This bubble is over one million years old. It was brought here when the first Atlanteans colonized this place. Deftly hand carried over billions of light years from our home planet. It is our people's most beloved and treasured ancient relic. But most importantly remember to have fun!
  • [Points to where the bubble is, and they walk to the bubble]
  • SpongeBob: There it is Patrick!
  • Both: The World's Oldest Living Bubble!
  • [They land on the safe keeping tube]
  • SpongeBob: Look at it, Patrick! So ancient, so floaty. It is the most beautiful, wrinkled up, dusty old bubble I've ever seen!
  • Patrick: Like a delicate air raisin!
  • [They slide off the glass]
  • LRH: Now if you'll excuse me, I have to make ready for tonight's dinner. So I'm just going to leave you two friendly strangers alone with our most beloved ancient and fragile Atlantean relic. Join us in the dining hall when you've had an eye-full!
  • [LRH leaves]
  • SpongeBob: Thank you, Mr. Lord Royal Highness, sir. [They shove their faces on the glass] Just look at it, Patrick. Ah the stories this bubble could tell. I just wish we could get a closer look. [They lean in but the glass moves] Patrick! Get the--
  • Patrick: Oh, golly! Oh, I don't know how much longer I can hold this!
  • [They managed to get the glass back after a close call when the bubble land on the glass on SpongeBob's side and bounces off without any harm, they laugh in victory]
  • SpongeBob: Whoo, that was a close one buddy!
  • Patrick: Yeah! We almost popped the most prized possession of all Atlantis-eans! [laughs]
  • SpongeBob: Boy, that would have been out greatest blunder without a doubt! But we should go before something bad does happen.
  • Patrick: Ooh! Let's get a picture for our scrapbooks before we leave.
  • SpongeBob: Great idea, Patrick!
  • Both: Cheese!
  • [Patrick's camera flashes, and the bubble pops]
  • SpongeBob: [teeth closed] Patrick, did you hear something?
  • Patrick: [teeth closed] A sort of a popping sound?
  • SpongeBob: Mmm-hmm.
  • [They look at each other screaming and their skin peels off, and SpongeBob's eyes fall in his mouth. Scene cuts to the gang having dinner]
  • LRH: So sorry I'm late. The tour ran a little long. So, how are you all enjoying our beloved city?
  • Squidward: I'm never leaving this place. I've learned more about painting in a few hours here than I did in four years of community college.
  • [Shows LRH a painting]
  • LRH: Absolutely marvelous! And Eugene, I assume the hall of treasure was everything you hoped for? [Mr. Krabs is brain-washed by the money and talks gibberish] And Sandra, how did you find our laboratory?
  • Sandy: They are just amazing! I used your invention room to make this!
  • LRH: Splendid. What does it do?
  • Sandy: I'll show you. [Presses a button, the food goes directly in her stomach and rubs it] Now I can eat underwater without removing my helmet! This is just the beginning! I should have a cure for the common cold up and running by tomorrow afternoon with your high-tech lab!
  • [SpongeBob and Patrick walks in feeling nervous]
  • LRH: SpongeBob, Patrick, tell me. How did you enjoy our rarest and most prized possession?
  • SpongeBob: [gulp] We have to go back to Bikini Bottom now!
  • All: Huh?
  • LRH: Ahahaha! Come. Enjoy the best Atlantean cuisine has to offer before you leave.
  • [SpongeBob and Patrick shakes.]
  • Squidward: What is wrong with you two morons?
  • SpongeBob: We have to go home now!
  • Squidward: Why would you want to leave a paradise like Atlantis?
  • SpongeBob: Because, uh, Gary misses me?
  • [Scene cuts to SpongeBob's house where Gary is having a party with other snails]
  • Patrick: We destroyed your most prized possession! [covers mouth]
  • LRH: [pauses] [laughs] If there's one thing, we Atlanteans enjoy, it's a healthy dose of dark humor!
  • SpongeBob: It's not a joke, we burst the bubble!
  • [Sandy and Squidward gasped.]
  • LRH: [laughs] That's not the real bubble. It's just a prop for the tourists. This is the real deal.
  • [Holds up the real bubble in a bottle]
  • Both: Ooh!
  • [Patrick takes a picture of the bubble, and the bubble finally pops]
  • LRH: [furiously snarls] Summon the Atlantean Royal Guard! [The guards come, and grunt, SpongeBob and Patrick shakes in fear for what they've done] Seize these hostile bubble poppers! [SpongeBob and Patrick scream and Squidward and Mr. Krabs join them]
  • Sandy: Don't just stand there! Move!
  • [She pushes the gang, the guards attack with a trident, pickaxe, and mace]
  • Mr. Krabs: Can't you go any faster Sandy?
  • Sandy: Maybe, if y'all would use your feet! [the gang's feet are skidding the ground]
  • Mr. Krabs: Never mind. Just keep doing what you're doing.
  • [Sandy groans in annoyance for her friends' laziness and cowardice. The guards shoot clear balls at them, Sandy throws Patrick like a boomerang, Patrick hits the wall]
  • Sandy: [grabs Patrick] Come on, Patrick!
  • [The guards shoot balls at them, and Sandy uses SpongeBob as a shield.]
  • SpongeBob: [laughs] That tickles! [laughs]
  • Sandy: Hang in there, little buddy! [she uses Squidward's tentacles to grab the shooting balls and fires the balls at the guards by pulling Squidward's nose like a gun. Then, she uses Mr. Krabs and he uses his claws to knock the guards out of the way.]
  • LRH: Don't let them get away!
  • [The guards follow the gang outside the building, but they all see Plankton's giant tank, Plankton aims at them while laughing diabolically. Patchy reappears]
  • Patchy: [realizes that there is no water left] This is the end of Patchy. No water, no food, and still no Encino. And here come the vultures the pick me bones! [Potty flies up] Shiver me timbers! It's Potty! I wonder what parrot tastes like... Come back here! Uh-oh. Here come the hallucinations.
  • SpongeBob: [laughs] Patchy, it's me. SpongeBob SquarePants. [Patchy is excited and laughs weakly] Don't lose hope. Everything will be all right when you get to Encino.
  • Patchy: But, Encino is gone.
  • SpongeBob: It's not gone, if you believe.
  • Patchy: Believe, believe. [falls asleep. Wakes up and reads the sign] Welcome to Encino! It's back! [hugs the sign] SpongeBob was right! All I had to do was believe! [laughs cheerfully]
  • ♪You got to believe. It was out of sight. You got to believe. I'm back in Encino. You got to believe. Everything's all right. The sky above, and the ground below. Bring me back into Encino. It was lost, some time ago, I'm just glad to be back home. You got to believe. I'm back in Encino. You got to believe. Everything's all right. You got to believe. I'm back in Encino. You got to believe. Everything's all right.♪
  • [Patchy is shown playing an instrumental by a man and woman at a bench, annoying them and making the latter's baby cry. They walk away as the chorus joins back in]
  • ♪You got to believe. I'm back in Encino. You got to believe. Everything's all right. You got to believe. I'm back in Encino. You got--♪
  • Patchy: [drops his ice-cream scoop and we hear strange sounds. Potty squawks, and then pokes Patchy] Ow! Ow! It was all a hallucination. Encino's still... gone! [Patchy groans] Ooh, a sandwich. Potty, you're a lifesaver. [opens a sandwich] Oh! Oh, Potty, you know I don't like mayo! [sees a vulture] Here, you want some? Go on. Uh... take it. I don't like the mayonnaise, you know. Once it gets up above 130, 135, the mayonnaise gets kind of... grody, you know.
  • [cuts to the gang standing in front of the tank]
  • Plankton: [laughs diabolically] Cower to me, fools! I have commandeered the most powerful weapon in the Atlantean arsenal! Now bow before the new king of Atlantis and prepare to taste my wrath! [He stomps on the switch, and the switch didn't budge] Yeah! Huh? Uh, uh I mean, uh, prepare to taste my wrath! [He stomps on the switch rapidly harder, but it still didn't budge] Oh, you! [Grabs a rock while struggling] Prepare to taste my wrath! [Throws the rock on the switch, and the switch budged]
  • Computer: Launch sequence deployed. [The tank shakes and Plankton laughs diabolically, everyone gasps, and they hold onto each other. The tank shoots out ice cream instead of missiles and a cow's moo is heard. SpongeBob and Patrick start eating ice cream.]
  • Patrick: Plankton's wrath tastes like ice cream!
  • Both: Thanks, Plankton!
  • Plankton: Ice cream? It shoots ice cream?! [Plankton jumps out of the tank] Oversized ice cream maker! [childishly kicks the tank, but hops around in pain] Yah! Ouch! Ow!
  • LRH: Look! A talking speck! This talking speck will make a fantastic [glares at SpongeBob and Patrick] replacement for our recently deflated national treasure. [Looks at Plankton] [Babyish tone] Won't you little fella?
  • Plankton: I'll destroy all of you--
  • LRH: [squeezes Plankton within his hands] Amazing! This is so much better than that dusty old bubble!
  • [Plankton gets put inside a baby bottle cage.]
  • Plankton: You haven't seen the last of me! When I get out of here, I'll hunt you all down like a pack of-- [someone takes a picture] Hey! Can't you read? [points at sign] No flash photography!
  • [The Atlantean tourists ignore him and continue taking pictures of Plankton. The gang gets back on the van.]
  • LRH: So nice to meet you all. I hope you have a safe journey back home. And do come back any time.
  • SpongeBob: So long. And thanks for the tour.
  • [Everyone is in, and LRH closes the door, he takes the amulet off the van and gives it to a guard.]
  • LRH: Dispose of this quickly. We can't survive anymore visitors like these.
  • Guard: [salutes] Sir, yes, sir!
  • [He runs to the dumpster and throws the amulet in there, LRH waves goodbye as they go off.]
  • LRH: I thought sponges were supposed to make life easier.
  • [Scene cuts to the bus] [Everyone is feeling sad, except SpongeBob]
  • SpongeBob: ♪Goodbye, Atlantis. But we really have to go. Back to a little town, that is the greatest place I know-oh-oh-oh-oh! Back to Bikini Bottom! I can hardly wait!♪
  • Mr. Krabs: ♪But what about the treasure? It was really great!♪
  • SpongeBob: ♪I love Bikini Bottom! It's where my Gary is!♪
  • Sandy: ♪But Atlantis had that science stuff at which I was a whiz!♪
  • SpongeBob: ♪Soon I'll see the Krusty Krab. Where I'm happily employed!♪
  • Patrick: ♪But Atlantis had the oldest bubble which I cruelly destroyed!♪
  • SpongeBob: ♪You can't beat Bikini Bottom! No place is so nice!♪
  • Squidward: ♪But Atlantis was a fabulous, artistic paradise!♪
  • SpongeBob: ♪Sorry, Squidward. But it's the end of our Atlantean vacation!♪
  • Squidward: ♪And back to my depressing life of quiet desperation.♪
  • SpongeBob: ♪Goodbye, Atlantis. We're Bikini Bottom bound!♪
  • Squidward: ♪Please turn this bus around!♪
  • SpongeBob: ♪We had our fun!♪
  • Patrick: ♪We sure did!♪
  • SpongeBob: ♪But now we're done.♪
  • Sandy: ♪And I'm bummed.♪
  • SpongeBob: ♪We're on our way!♪
  • Sandy: ♪Can't we stay?♪
  • SpongeBob: ♪So now we say goodbye!♪
  • Mr. Krabs: I think I'm gonna cry!
  • Patrick: Me too! [he and Mr. Krabs start sobbing hysterically]
  • SpongeBob: ♪Goodbye, Atlantis. We're Bikini Bottom bound. There's no place like home!♪
  • Mr. Krabs: There's no place like Atlantis!
  • SpongeBob: ♪I can't wait to get home.♪
  • Mr. Krabs: I don't wanna go back!
  • SpongeBob: ♪We're Bikini Bottom bound!♪
  • Sandy: Please, don't make us leave!
  • SpongeBob: ♪We're Bikini Bottom bound!♪
  • Squidward: Stop saying that!
  • SpongeBob: ♪I even love the sound!♪
  • All: ♪Goodbye, Atlantis! Boo hoo♪
  • SpongeBob: ♪Bikini Bottom is the greatest place to be! I can--♪
  • All: ♪Goodbye, Atlantis!♪ [fades to black, then Patchy reappears]
  • Patchy: Pretty good story, eh, kids? [steps on something, which happens to be Encino] I found Encino! [realized it's been shrunken] But it's all tiny! Somebody must have... [sees a big blue beam while he cries out in shock, and three aliens appear]
  • Norbluckfive's mother: Sorry, sir. Our son Norbluckfive was messing with his shrink-a-tron again.
  • Patchy: No, no, no, no! I want Encino full size again! There's no place like home! There's no place like home!
  • Norbluckfive's mother: Okay, hand it over, Norbluckfive. [Norbluckfive pulls out a remote and gives it to his mother] We'll fix your town, Beardy!
  • Patchy: Beardy?! [Then, Norbluckfive's mother pushes the button, causing a huge tornado to be created with Patchy in it yelling. Cuts to Patchy's house] Well, Look's like everything's back to the right size, eh, Potty? [Wonders where Potty is] Potty?
  • Potty: Burrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr! [Stomps on Patchy]
  • Patchy: Owww! Well, kids, I'm a little busy right now, but, be sure to come back real soon for more of your old pal Patchy! Ow! And more SpongeBob SquarePants! Potty, will you get off of me?! [SpongeBob laughs]
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